A brunette
Dude: Scope those curvacious maidens. I’ll pounce the coal top with the bouncing betties. What’s your ruling on the blonde?
Wingman: The dewclaws are up.
This is short for pertinent information.
Coworker: I've got a potential customer on line 2 for you.
Response: What are the perts?
Coworker: It's a woman named Josephine Dokes. She's got an afghan hound and she saw our ad for the no-tangle pet comb.
a disorder whereby a person has recurring thoughts about breaking wind in crowded and, often times, confined places (This is a dangerous situation in which the person in question is on the verge of becoming a sphincter Sinatra if he/she does not receive professional help or, at the very least, a bitch slap by his/her friends.)
Paratrooper: Sarge, I know it’s not the time but I keep thinking about plantin’ some onion.
Jumpmaster: GOT DAMN IT!!! Ya better at-ease those flatusidal tendencies or I’ll toss your goat-smellin’ ass off this bird right now, green light or not.
Buy a
flatusidal tendencies
mug!
when something meets with an unfortunate demise or the sound made when this occurs
“I twisted the dilly-doo until the thingy lined up with the whosie-whatsit and wouldn’t ya know it. The dingus got all gashnitzed and gashnizzled and the jobby-joo went wizz-bang out the back. Please forgive me if I’m getting too technical for you. It’s just that I’ve been workin’ in the doojigger biz since I was knee-high to a whatchamacallit and I rarely interact with you civilians.”
a large set of women’s breasts that perform a lively mating dance with the eyes of every man whos body is coursing with testosterone (A man need not be in eye-shot of such a spectacle to be effected as his...ur, umm…”divining rod” points the way like a compass to magnetic north.)
Dude: Scope those curvacious maidens. I’ll pounce the coal top with the bouncing betties. What’s your ruling on the blonde?
Wingman: The dewclaws are up.
Buy a
bouncing betties
mug!
A restaurant or place to eat
Usage:
"I gotta squat for a jiffy wiz in The Gran Manzana and I've been head sparkin’ ‘bout pounding that Coney fillet in a twee fire-in-the-hole.
The dewclaws are up. Ya wanna draft my flivver?
Bang the pipes by 5:00 or hold peace.”
Translation:
"I’ve got a layover in New York City and was thinking about getting a hotdog in a quaint restaurant.
I’m enthusiastic. Do you want to come along?
Call me by 5:00 or it will be too late."
Buy a
Fire-in-the-hole
mug!
When a person is not carrying a weapon.
Even though Elvis was surrounded with bodyguards he would carry numerous pistols at a time, but what about when he was performing? He wore those form-fitting jumpsuits and made such grand stage movements. Was he packin’ or did he go sleek?
