assguru

Experienced but ageing toilet trader

I bumped into Luke last night.

Really, is he still in business? He's old but he's still got the moves. A real assguru!

by cuksocker November 09, 2010

gina ford

waterboard ), especially in a comic sense referring to strict punishments for children - rhyming slang derived from name of eminently well respected child rearing expert.

She won't stay on the naughty step, no matter what I do.
Gina Ford her. It always works for my kids.

by cuksocker December 26, 2010

Bum and coke

Drug-fuelled Cottaging in a cocktail bar or other upmarket drinking establishment toilet.

Did you come her straight from home tonight?

No, I popped into the Lord Lucan for a quick Bum and Coke.

by cuksocker November 09, 2010

Andy W

Two-handed reach around (derived from 'handy double you')

Did you get a reach around?' 'Even better, an Andy W.'

by cuksocker December 07, 2010

permiedom

Permanent employment (being a permie), as viewed by a contractor.

The contract market is so bad that I may be force to abase myself before the altar of permiedom.

by Cuksocker November 06, 2010

Fetch the puppy

Euphemism for: 'Felch the puppy', or 'Felch the cute young guy'.

Guy 1: Are you taking that puppy upstairs to the sauna? You wanna live the Berlin experience!
Guy 2: No way, I'm gonna totally fetch the puppy in my shower room. He's all mine.

by cuksocker August 30, 2013

shitting in reverse

The circumstance where you find yourself in the position of needing to defacate but unable to locate a suitable venue for the proceedings. The resultant clenching of the sphincter in the hopes of preventing an incident of touching cloth results in the feeling that the incipient turd is reversing back up into your lower intestines.

May be performed intentionally in order to preserve the waiting feces for later use. E.G in a cleveland steamer.

Oh man, I hope we find a toilet soon. I'm shitting in reverse.

If I have shit in reverse again I'm going to end up spitting it out.

by cuksocker November 06, 2010