Derogatory slang-term usually used by men whilst drinking in bars, but could be used in any conversation between men or dyke lesbians, referencing a trashy-looking, low-rent sort of woman with blonde hair. Possibly more used in the South than other parts of the U.S.
by coozehound72 August 17, 2010
Get the blond-ho mug.A term for a mousy-type woman, who might wear glasses and have a beak-like nose, and somewhat pretentious about films and stage performances, very dorky about such things and all, and has a preference for melted cheese on almost any other type of food other than unmelted cheese.
A cheese-bird may be known to smear brie on white bread and consider it a delicacy, or eat wheels of cheddar in just a few days. The cheese-bird strays from cheeses like Morbier, Stilton, and Cambazola. The cheese-bird prefers basic American cheeses such as Colby, Monterey Jack, Mild Cheddar, and even Sharp Cheddar too! And scoffs in maniacal laughter at the mention of Velveeta, somewhat pretentious in her faux-expertise on the subject of high-class varieties of American-made cheeses. She may consider her knowledge that 'chevre' is the French equivalent of 'goat cheese', and attempt to advise others, who already know as such, of such inanities.
Cheese-birds are known to fly to Wisconsin for winter, and sometimes, their bellies become so filled with cheese in such a cheese-fueled society there, that they can't fly out of the cheese-bird ponds from too much cheese-weight, and their legs then become frozen there in the icy pond, and they die there, lonely corpses, farting out fetid, sulfuric cheese-farts from their rotted and frozen cheese-bird zombie corpses.
A cheese-bird may be known to smear brie on white bread and consider it a delicacy, or eat wheels of cheddar in just a few days. The cheese-bird strays from cheeses like Morbier, Stilton, and Cambazola. The cheese-bird prefers basic American cheeses such as Colby, Monterey Jack, Mild Cheddar, and even Sharp Cheddar too! And scoffs in maniacal laughter at the mention of Velveeta, somewhat pretentious in her faux-expertise on the subject of high-class varieties of American-made cheeses. She may consider her knowledge that 'chevre' is the French equivalent of 'goat cheese', and attempt to advise others, who already know as such, of such inanities.
Cheese-birds are known to fly to Wisconsin for winter, and sometimes, their bellies become so filled with cheese in such a cheese-fueled society there, that they can't fly out of the cheese-bird ponds from too much cheese-weight, and their legs then become frozen there in the icy pond, and they die there, lonely corpses, farting out fetid, sulfuric cheese-farts from their rotted and frozen cheese-bird zombie corpses.
Buddy #1: 'Are you still dating that 'cheese-bird'?
Buddy #2 'Well, kind of.....I mean, last I heard she was working at a renaissance fair, selling pickles and all. She's actually called 'The Pickle Girl', I mean, that's her stage name or whatever.'
Buddy #1: 'Man, when's that cheese-bird flying to Wisconsin, bro?'
Buddy #2: 'Dude, pretty soon, hopefully soon, actually. Pretty sure Renaissance Fair season is over now and all.'
Buddy #1: 'Fuck yeah, yo, maybe she'll get stuck in a cheese-pond, whuuuuttt????'
Buddy #2 'Well, kind of.....I mean, last I heard she was working at a renaissance fair, selling pickles and all. She's actually called 'The Pickle Girl', I mean, that's her stage name or whatever.'
Buddy #1: 'Man, when's that cheese-bird flying to Wisconsin, bro?'
Buddy #2: 'Dude, pretty soon, hopefully soon, actually. Pretty sure Renaissance Fair season is over now and all.'
Buddy #1: 'Fuck yeah, yo, maybe she'll get stuck in a cheese-pond, whuuuuttt????'
by coozehound72 September 20, 2010
Get the cheese-bird mug.Slang for the amount of cheese one eats, usually referenced in a derogatory manner, towards women, but can be used in reference to men as well. Usually references a more than necessary amount of cheese eaten by one person, sometimes in gross and disgusting excess.
Buddy #1: 'Did you notice the amount of cheese-intake with grease-puss today? More than one cup o' cheese for sure today, my brother!'
Buddy #2: 'Oh, that fat-bitch has got serious Jessica Simpson disorder, but not a fraction as fuckable tho as that blond-ho. Goddamn fat, stupid cheese-sloth! I just don't get how a person can drink melted Velveeta, from a coffee cup!!'
Buddy #2: 'Oh, that fat-bitch has got serious Jessica Simpson disorder, but not a fraction as fuckable tho as that blond-ho. Goddamn fat, stupid cheese-sloth! I just don't get how a person can drink melted Velveeta, from a coffee cup!!'
by coozehound72 August 17, 2010
Get the cheese-intake mug.A term for what's found on the bathroom floor after one has defecated or shat in the toilet and clogged the toilet bowl with paper or paper towels and the shit and toilet paper has overflowed from the toilet onto the floor.
Girl: 'Babe, is this your shit-mess on the bathroom floor again?'
Guy: 'I dunno, what color is it anyways?'
Girl: 'Gross, babe, why does the color matter?'
Guy: 'Spinach salad earlier, if it's got some green mixed in, it's my shit-mess, but you'll want to clean it, please?'
Girl: 'Fuck off, dude, I'm not cleaning this crap!'
Guy: 'Clean it or no sex later!'
Girl: 'OK, I'll get the mop and all...'
Guy: 'I dunno, what color is it anyways?'
Girl: 'Gross, babe, why does the color matter?'
Guy: 'Spinach salad earlier, if it's got some green mixed in, it's my shit-mess, but you'll want to clean it, please?'
Girl: 'Fuck off, dude, I'm not cleaning this crap!'
Guy: 'Clean it or no sex later!'
Girl: 'OK, I'll get the mop and all...'
by coozehound72 September 04, 2010
Get the shit-mess mug.The opposite of 'swallowage'. The act of spitting out, instead of swallowing, a man's jizz-load or cum, after a man ejaculates into a woman's(or man's) mouth, during the act of fellatio or getting a B.J.. Yet, sometimes, accompanied by vomit, as the jizz has actually been ingested and then puked out. Almost synonymous with jizz-spat, though jizz-spat is more of an immediate reaction of spitting out the cum before it reaches the person's stomach.
Girl: 'Slob, slob, slob, slurp, glump, glurg, gulp, CACK!!!'
Guy: 'Hey, slag-face, what's up, no swallowage???
Girl: 'Ewwww, no WAY!!! I would never do something gross like that!'
Guy: 'Well, then, you'd better clean up all that spattage on my expensive shag rug, along with that period blood....slag.'
Guy: 'Hey, slag-face, what's up, no swallowage???
Girl: 'Ewwww, no WAY!!! I would never do something gross like that!'
Guy: 'Well, then, you'd better clean up all that spattage on my expensive shag rug, along with that period blood....slag.'
by coozehound72 August 17, 2010
Get the spattage mug.A term of endearment, used by a man or a woman, in reference to their partner, after the man ejaculates either inside of or over the other's anus. Also, can be used as a derogatory term for gay men, but only rarely, and in jest amongst straight men, who are feigning 'gayness' for the amusement of friends and/or family.
Gay guy #1: 'Hey there, slippery-tail, how'd you like that last bung-load?'
Gay guy #2: 'Ohhhhh, marvelous, my jizzy-boy, thanks kindly, when may I have another?'
Gay guy #1: 'Hold your horses there, humpy-buns, I gotta reload and do some more coke.
Gay guy #2: 'Ohhhhh, marvelous, my jizzy-boy, thanks kindly, when may I have another?'
Gay guy #1: 'Hold your horses there, humpy-buns, I gotta reload and do some more coke.
by coozehound72 August 17, 2010
Get the slippery-tail mug.Another term for defecation or shitting, but meant to sound more pleasant, almost in a fun and silly kind of way, so that, when you're telling someone that you need to defecate or shit, it doesn't sound like such a gross-out.
Guy: 'Hey, babe, what's up, no toilet paper again??? I've got to poop-out right NOW!!'
Girl: 'It's ok, honey, just use the paper towels roll, but please don't clog the bowl'
Guy: 'You know I will, babe, gettin' ready to poop-out a horse-dick turd and all'
Girl: 'Ok, but I'm not cleaning your shit-mess off the floor this time, for realz!'
Guy: 'The hell you aren't!!! Better clean it or no sex tonight!'
Girl: 'It's ok, honey, just use the paper towels roll, but please don't clog the bowl'
Guy: 'You know I will, babe, gettin' ready to poop-out a horse-dick turd and all'
Girl: 'Ok, but I'm not cleaning your shit-mess off the floor this time, for realz!'
Guy: 'The hell you aren't!!! Better clean it or no sex tonight!'
by coozehound72 September 04, 2010
Get the poop-out mug.