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cogitheum@mac.com's definitions

bar

A State regulating body for lawyers that treats information like it's a controlled substance.
In most states, the bar makes it a crime just to give advice to friends without paying government extortion.
by cogitheum@mac.com December 22, 2008
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laundry payday

When a person collects cash from his dryer immediately after doing laundry. This term has a different connotation from laundry lottery based on the reliability and frequency of the phenomenon. Laundry paydays are what people who never clean out their pockets get, every week, just like a paycheck. Like a laundry lottery, this produces momentary happiness until the person realizes that they had the money all along.
I can't go drink tonight, but tomorrow is laundry payday, so hit me up then.
by cogitheum@mac.com February 4, 2009
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relationship pardon

Where, typically at the end of a relationship, one or usually both parties extend forgiveness for all bad acts performed during the course of the relationship.
Ex 1: You never apologized for x.
Ex 2: I didn't have to. It was covered under the relationship pardon.
by cogitheum@mac.com February 5, 2009
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hanging out my shingle

When a professional (especially a lawyer), rather than looking for a job, just goes and finds clients. This takes guts and a willingness to work constantly for precious little money in exchange for autonomy.
Law student 1: Hey, you made top 10%. I bet you could get that $160,000 opening at Rob, Ewe, and Howe!

Law student 2: Fuck those guys. I don't want to kiss ass for the next 20 years. I'm hanging out my shingle.
by cogitheum@mac.com February 7, 2009
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white briefcase

The award for the highest GPA in a law school class.
Parker's gonna get white briefcase. I can feel it.
by cogitheum@mac.com February 7, 2009
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the needle

They can give you 25 to life, or they can give you the needle.
by cogitheum@mac.com February 22, 2017
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