clarebear81's definitions

cell phone

An electronic device that imprisons you.

John wasn't granted access to his wife and kids. He had been sentenced to a life long-career with a cell phone.

by Clarebear81 March 2, 2011

smutphone

A smartphone used primarily for looking up porn and sending suggestive texts.

Jez is such a creep! Look at the message he just sent me from his smutphone!!

by Clarebear81 March 5, 2011

apple maxed

A condition whereby you have more apple branded products than is justifiable or necessary.

With the new iPad she got from her bosses at work, the iPhone upgrade and the new MacBook, Clare felt completely apple maxed.

by Clarebear81 January 7, 2011

ladvertising

An advertisement unquestioningly written for a male audience/client, usually augmented by an excessive display of female flesh to make it popular with either/both parties.

Did you see the new Lynx advert? The girls were pretty much naked!" "Don't worry, Sally, that was just a bit of ladvertising. I'm sure Robbie appreciated it, even if you didn't.

by Clarebear81 December 2, 2010

carnal footprint

A measure of one's sexual activity and its impact.

John tended to avoid sex on a Sunday in an attempt to off-set his carnal footprint.

by Clarebear81 April 6, 2011

entou-rage

The feeling of extreme irritation you experience when the email function on your apple mac malfunctions yet again.

Moluk: "Watch out for Jenny! She's experiencing some serious entou-rage at the moment because her mac has crashed for the fifth time today!"
Cassie: "Jeezuz! Who can blame her? It stresses me out so much when that happens!"

by Clarebear81 December 4, 2010