chesterpest's definitions
When you are allowed out with the lads for a 'heavy lashing' due to exceptional circumstances which can't be refused (eg Wetting the babies head, Stag Do etc). Also commonly referred to as a '24 hour pass'.
'But love, its Barry's stag do, I can't not go - you've got to give me special dispensation!!', 'hmmmmm, this is the seventh stag do that Barry's had in 3 months' murmured Tracy suspiciously.
by chesterpest January 22, 2010
Get the special dispensationmug. A lumpy deformed turd making its appearance after a gruelling period of constipation and often consisting of several layered and compacted hard mini turds.
'That laxative certainly did the trick' exclaimed paul, 'but I appear to have given birth to an enormous frankenstool in the process'!
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
Get the frankenstoolmug. 1. A technique used by defenders to put attacking players in an offside position, by moving quickly away from their own goal to leave attackers offside.
2. A lady's 'backdoor' or 'back passage'.
2. A lady's 'backdoor' or 'back passage'.
That bag of chips I bought her was a good investment last night, not only did I get my end away, but I also managed to slip one in her 'offside trap'.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
Get the Offside Trapmug. A typical welshman/woman who bang on about their nationality and how 'welsh and proud' they are, naively oblivious of the biggest irony of all: that they nearly always come last at everything. On the rare occasion that they win something like a rugby match they get several years mileage out of it and often canonise the try scorer giving them fucking ridiculous names like 'Merve the swerve'. Another sad irony is that the most vociforous of these creatures can't even speak fucking welsh.
Have you heard that Dave now spells his name 'Dafydd' and has just posted a picture of a dragon on his facebook. Apparently his Nans, Uncles Father in Law was welsh - what a fucking daffodick!!!!
by chesterpest January 22, 2010
Get the Daffodickmug. An extermely attractive woman who, as soon as she opens her mouth, has a strong and unattractive gutteral, regional accent.
'I couldn't believe my eyes, so immediately rushed over to get in there before the competition only to discover that she was an scouse 'earplugger' and I couldn't understand a fucking word she uttered.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
Get the Earpluggermug. a turd so long and unbroken when dispatched that it refuses to leave the bowl, even after several flushes.
'Dad!' cried little Jimmy, 'We've got a cumberlodge'. 'Don't worry son, i'll get my walking stick and we'll break it up a bit first'.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
Get the cumberlodgemug. Fuck me, i've never seen anything like it - she had a twat like Hagrid's Beard. I had to get the hedgetrimmers out, her bedroom floor looked like a fucking Barbers Shop after a busy day!
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
Get the hagrid's beardmug.