Brian thought he’d make a great porn star but his greasy hair, two inch dick, hairy back, acne scared face, Oompa Loompa orange tan, flat ass, three minute staying power, and his problem with anal leakage made him a real Porno No-No.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Someone who thinks that living downtown is the only way to go and that everyone else is an uncultured rube.
“I can’t visit her, she lives in the suburbs for God’s sake! You might as well ask me to go to the deep south or the dark heart of Africa or some other place with no running water or appletinis!” Shrieked the uppity urbanite.
“Oh...my...God....is that a cow?! Hold me, I’m scared, it’s going to be just like Deliverance”
“Shut the fuck up, Catherine. If you’re going to pull this uppity urbanite shit with me we will end this road trip right now.”
“Oh...my...God....is that a cow?! Hold me, I’m scared, it’s going to be just like Deliverance”
“Shut the fuck up, Catherine. If you’re going to pull this uppity urbanite shit with me we will end this road trip right now.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Lacy was going to kill her boyfriend. He’d been dipping into her expensive imported face cream to use as nutta butta again.
Adam couldn’t decide which nutta butta he wanted to use. The Astroglide, coconut oil, or the hand lotion...decisions, decisions.
Adam couldn’t decide which nutta butta he wanted to use. The Astroglide, coconut oil, or the hand lotion...decisions, decisions.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
“If that receptionist says one damn thing about my hair, I will declaw her ass so fast.”
"If she starts getting catty, just say something about her husband leaving her for another woman. That'll declaw her in a second."
"If she starts getting catty, just say something about her husband leaving her for another woman. That'll declaw her in a second."
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
“Dude, you gonna help me move up that couch we found out by the dumpster?”
“Nah, that looks like it’s a scabies sanctuary.”
Tara thought that sweet almost chair from the second hand store was a steal. Too bad for her, it was a scabies sanctuary.
“Nah, that looks like it’s a scabies sanctuary.”
Tara thought that sweet almost chair from the second hand store was a steal. Too bad for her, it was a scabies sanctuary.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Someone who insists on getting in everyone’s face and insulting and belittling them on their food choices.
“Oh, girl, I just watched a Nutrition Nazi rip some poor girl a new asshole for having a carton of non-soy milk in her cart at the grocery store!”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Someone who spends an entire party bitch about who isn’t there or how late some people are in showing up or how early they are in leaving. This is usually all they talk about which pisses off everyone at the party.
“Don’t invite her, she’s a party pouter and she’ll spend the entire night bitching that her friends aren’t there.”
When Ricardo starting turning into a party pouter the host told him to either leave or shut up.
When Ricardo starting turning into a party pouter the host told him to either leave or shut up.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008