benchmax345's definitions

mid-life crisis

Mid-life crisis (MLC, not to be confused with TLC) is a very common among people ranging from 30-50 years of age. In every aspects of our lives, mid-life crisis finds its voice through every passage of our lives. People with mid-life crisis falsely believed that they are young (from ages 15-25). They drive a Corvette, Mustang, and other sports vehicles. On a daily basis, people with mid-life crisis can be discovered/hunt down on regular college campuses. People with mid-life crisis can be best described by using the term-"middy-life." Middy-lifes have an untrammeled desire to achieve a feeling of youthfulness and horniness. The effects of mid-life crisis can lead an individual to evolve into a pedo bear.

If you are 30 years old or older, then you are a mid-life crisis.

by benchmax345 May 10, 2008

Ben Assfleck

Synonym: Ben Affleck

Ben Affleck acted like Ben Assfleck in Daredevil lawl.

by BenchMax345 February 29, 2008

drunkaholic

Someone who surpass the capability of an alcoholic. To be a drunkaholic, you must not only be addicted to alcohol, but you must be addicted to getting extremely wasted. Drunkaholic can only be mastered by a few individuals on this planet. To be a drunkaholic, you must drink at every parties; furthermore, you must drink everyday. Drunkaholic remain drunk 24/7 to avoid a hangover.

**At the farm**
D-Unit: I want my Hpnotic and Crown Royal.
B-Unit: Dude, no more drinking for you. I don't want to have a drunkaholic as a friend.
D-Unit: Boo hoo.

by BenchMax345 March 1, 2008

LockDown Browser

To think that everything is bulletproof without a single doubt. Lockdown Browser was thought to prevent students from cheating while taking an online test. Powerfully, virtually every individuals who live in the U.S. owns a digital camera. Next, we all can film all the test questions. Although Lockdown browser can be used for Mastering Chemistry, Math Compass, and other shit, IT proudly became gay and manipulate and directed the algorithm to only D2L. To simplify, the term Lockdown Browser can be use for someone who thinks he/she has hope, but his/her hopes always shatter in tragedy.

Emo: I think I'm going to pass Calculus and Spanish with an A. I'm so happy that I'm going to cut my sad long hair.
Balla: Quit being a Lockdown Browser, you failed all your test and expect to pull off an A in those courses? Why don't you get your mom dildo out of your dickhole ya faggot.
Emo (singing): "Cut my wrist and black my eyes."

by BenchMax345 February 7, 2008

NATO

Need Alcohol To Operate

Dude1: Dude, she won't have sex with me.
Powerful Kid: That's because she NATO on everyone.
Dude1: WTF? I've taken U.S. History already.
Powerful Kid: You cock fag! You need to fill er' up with alcohol before you can "operate" on her.
Dude1: Oh...

by BenchMax345 March 29, 2008

OHLAP

Oklahoma Higher Learner Access Program (abbrev. OHLAP) is an Oklahoma's Promise scholarship granted for low income parents. Parents with an income of less than $50,000 a year and high school student(s) who worked their ass off earned it. There are specific high school courses that must be taken in order for OHLAP to be rewarded. OHLAP is one of the fastest growing scholarships in Oklahoma. OHLAP pays full tuition towards your college degree. This is a very godly/Chuck Norris scholarship that people take for granted. To date, over 30,000 students enrolled for OHLAP since its inception (source: my high school counselor). The higher your parent’s income, the better your ACT scores have to be in order to achieve…OHLAP (ACT score of a 30 right here BOOYAH! Flawlessly pwned). In order for the effects of this scholarship to remain beneficial, you must maintain a grade point average of an A> (3.60>.) and "promise" to stay away from trouble (i.e. drugs, alcohol, your mom). This scholarship can only be negated by successfully acquiring your bachelor degree or simply "student of failures." On the negative side of the spectrum, if you procrastinated your ass off and haven't procure your bachelor degree within the five years period, then OHLAP's powerful effects will eventually diminish; hence, your balls will be tragically suppress in a hectic manner (which in turn leads to death of purple balls). Absurdly, OHLAP has some dark secrets to deny its existence by your side (which will, in terms, give you a deadly purple nurple). For more history on OHLAP, you must google it. I'm only here to provide this information b/c I have too much time in my hands. Yes, I know; I'm very immature, but I'm hope you're smart enough to tie your own shoes and determine which information is false (i.e. your balls and breast being mutilated).

Vy and I got OHLAP b/c we pwned every AP courses. And mainly, b/c I can bench press 345lbs in high school and pwned the AP Calculus exam with a five. OHLAP is pleased. HOOAH!

by benchmax345 August 25, 2008

Valentineless

Someone who does not have a valentine. They seek hope, but they face a severe beat down. Although this symptom temporary, it may lead to a catastrophic event.

Friend: Who's your valentine?
Me: No one, I'm Valentineless.
Friend: Oh.

by BenchMax345 February 14, 2008