WhoaTimesTwo's definitions

wagnard

The ultimate form of a stupid, idiotic, moron. Someone who is just so dumb that you had to make up a word to describe them, because no other word did them justice.

Jimmy's a freakin' wagnard. He jizzed in my urine sample and then put bacon bits in it.

by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

crops

The children of a hillbilly farmer whose actual produce failed during the year. He takes them to fairs to enter into contests instead of actual food, though they don't taste nearly as well. They usually can succeed well if entered as yams or squash. Poor kids have to live with that for the rest of their lives.

Jim Bob: Mah corns dinn't grow so wyell tis yar, so I took my two gyurls Wynona and Edbert to the fair! Hyuck. They won the squarsh contest!

by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

reading my email

One of several innocent-sounding responses which can be used by regular porn viewers when their parents/spouse(s) ask them what they're doing on the computer.

Mom: What're you doing?
Juan: Reading my email.
Mom: Oh cool. Can I read mine too?
Dad: Uh no honey, come back later...this is an important email. We'll be done in about an hour.

by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

intrusion shield

What every single dude needs to wear when he goes out on the town at night. It comes in two models- stainless steel buns and plasma offender repulsion. Stainless steel lets people know you're well defended (and leaves your enemy with marks and bad dreams), while plasma offender repulsion lets you make sure the offender will never offend again.

After slipping on a package of cottage cheese, Steve was saved from mass absolute bangage by his stainless steel buns intrusion shield.

by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

drangaw

The opposite of a wagnard. To be totally balls to the wall awesome. Usually a compliment reserved for a very special occasion, such as when someone saves your life or the dude at Dairy Queen gives you the most awesome non-melted-cheese cheeseburger you have ever experienced.

1. Dude you just saved my life, you are totally the drangaw!

2. OMG U R TEH AWESOME!!!111!!

by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

tail over the fence

When you just barely escape an area after some serious shiz goes down. Usually involves fleeing from incoming cops, or somebody's really strong mother.

My buddies and I lit fire to Mrs. Lindon's rose beds while she was home. I got my tail over the fence, but Rico and Hugh got sodomized by a mop handle.

by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

The Duke

A drafting teacher at a particular high school. The baddest engineer mofo to ever walk the face of the earth. If you do something bad in his class, you get owned immediately, due to all the cameras watching your every move. He frequently calls people dude or man.

Verb: to duke; duked

Means to get owned by The Duke

Guy #1: So how was The Duke's class today?
Guy #2: Man, this guy was messing around with all the computers, and The Duke totally duked him out. Now he's banned from all computers in the school!
Guy #1: Boner...

by WhoaTimesTwo October 17, 2004