Uncle Whippity's definitions

holding hands with sausage

Euphemism for masturbation, especially in a semi-secluded public area - for example in a cinema seat.

"That skinny bloke over there is holding hands with sausage under his jacket."
"Dirty git!"

by Uncle Whippity May 7, 2008

troops massing at the border

The final stages of a bukkake-style movie, where the male performers crowd in towards the face of the female star prior to ejaculation.

Jemima looked around in nervous anticipation as George, Alexander, Hugh, Roger, Trevor, Claude, Martin and Harry shuffled closer to her, manhoods standing proud. She could see the troops massing at the border, and it was only a matter of seconds before she was the cover star of the Tatler bukkake special.

by Uncle Whippity December 27, 2008

gone to shirt

When something has got so bad it's affecting your typing.

This place has recently gone to shirt.

by Uncle Whippity February 17, 2005

Ka

A distinctively-shaped small car built by Ford. Derided by some, although adored by owners.

"A Book of Verses underneath the Bough,
A red Ford Ka, a Loaf of Bread - and Thou
Beside me singing in the Wilderness -
Oh, Wilderness were Paradise enow!"
The revised Rubayyat of Omar Khayyam

by Uncle Whippity October 5, 2004

holding hands with sausage

Euphemism for masturbation, especially when done in a secluded public place - for example a cinema seat.

'See that bloke over there? He's got his jacket over his lap, but it looks like he's holding hands with sausage.'
'Dirty git!'

by Uncle Whippity May 8, 2008

TFW

That fncking Welshman. Used to summarise a load of ills.

I am absolutely TFW'd out today. He hasn't stopped talking and none of it has made sense.

by Uncle Whippity January 12, 2004

10-1

Derived from the CB '10-code' meaning 'Receiving poorly' but now used among a certain generation to mean anything that's a bit crap.

He said he'd wired up the amplifier properly, but it's all a bit 10-1 if you ask me.

by Uncle Whippity May 9, 2004