Uncle Joosie's definitions

Chyron Shade

when CNN's chyron writer is like "fuck it Don is toast"

Harold was CNN's on-duty chyron writer when AP called presidential race for Joe Biden. "thank GOD" he thought to himself, then started thinking up cutting burns. after typing in "THE TRUMP SHOW HAS A SERIES FINALE DATE" he muttered "now that's some Grade A Chyron Shade" and sipped his tea.

by Uncle Joosie November 8, 2020

Covid Cootie-cross

when someone approaching you crosses the street to avoid contagion

Karla was walking and talking to mom on her cell and noticed a dude who crossed to the other side. "OMG mama this guy just did a Covid Cootie-cross on me!"

by Uncle Joosie April 22, 2020

tricky dick prison tattoo

Roger Stone's tattoo clarion call for nookie in prison

Roger Stone entered prison today and took of his shirt; Bowser, inmate No. 3452B, saw Stone's tricky dick prison tattoo and thought "mmm imma get me some of that"

by Uncle Joosie January 25, 2019

Psaki Shade

when Jen Psaki drags Casino Mobster from the podium

after a dopey Beltway reporter asked if trump's upcoming Red Hat cult rally in Ohio will result in violence, Biden's white house press secretary served signature Psaki Shade: "We don't really give a fuck what The Former Guy does, dude. next?"

by Uncle Joosie June 21, 2021

beaver that pickle

when your father nibbles the seeds and discards the rind

Larry finished his deli sandwich and picked up the pickle spear; instead of eating the whole thing he decided to beaver that pickle and gnaw the seeds out

by Uncle Joosie April 29, 2019

Cruella de Puppykiller

Kristi Noem

Appearing on CBS News, Cruella de Puppykiller Kristi Noem once again tried to explain away how she murdered puppy Cricket in a gravel pit—then went on to suggest she'd probably shoot Commander, President Biden's dog. Referring to the dog as "it" just completed the picture of her violent pathology. Everyone should keep their furry children away from that psychopath.

by Uncle Joosie May 6, 2024

Dumbtitlement

Covidiots who feel entitled to kill others with a bioweapon

COVID-positive California teacher, actively symptomatic, read to her class without a breathing mask and got more than half of her students sick. In MAGA's suicide cult Dumbtitlement runs rampant and is literally putting people at risk.

by Uncle Joosie August 30, 2021