The, ahem, barbaric act of cutting off a guy's penis. Named for one such lucky guy, John Bobbitt, whose then-wife sliced off his manhood before tossing it in the woods. (Don't worry, they found it later).
Charlie: Have you heard that Tom got Bobbitted?
Carrie: He deserved it. Tom cheated on Miranda with Allie, Julie and Kate, and he was working on Erica. What a cad!
Charlie: I hope that I didn't eat his wiener with mustard and relish for lunch. He's gross!
Carrie: He deserved it. Tom cheated on Miranda with Allie, Julie and Kate, and he was working on Erica. What a cad!
Charlie: I hope that I didn't eat his wiener with mustard and relish for lunch. He's gross!
by The Real Canadian April 29, 2019
Get the Bobbitted mug.The stench, psychological and physical damage, and destruction that result from raising 13 kids (and counting) under dirty, creepy and abusive circumstances. It only takes one person (a close family member) to expose two weirdos for that they really are.
My partner and I wanted to buy a house in Perris, but it was covered in Turpintine. We settled for an old crack house instead.
by The Real Canadian May 05, 2018
Get the Turpintine mug.When you go to an expensive or prestigious store, college, club or hair salon and get snubbed or patronized because of how you look. People who look like bums, hookers, hicks (think Hee Haw) and trailer trash are frequently targeted; also, people of color and indigenous groups.
Ida Lee, who grew up in a trailer park outside Palookaville, was an honor student and cheer captain. She went to an Ivy League college on full scholarship, but the snobby students and profs Pretty Womaned her, saying that she wasn’t smart enough for university.
Elaine, a taxi driver who moonlights at an art gallery, goes to a fancy hair salon - and gets Pretty Womaned, leaving the place looking like Ronald McDonald.
LaShawn and Supinder go to Holt Renfrew, only to be Pretty Womaned by a snotty clerk. They were told that Value Village had a yellow tag sale. (LaShawn and Supinder could afford Holt Renfrew, but they’re people of color).
Elaine, a taxi driver who moonlights at an art gallery, goes to a fancy hair salon - and gets Pretty Womaned, leaving the place looking like Ronald McDonald.
LaShawn and Supinder go to Holt Renfrew, only to be Pretty Womaned by a snotty clerk. They were told that Value Village had a yellow tag sale. (LaShawn and Supinder could afford Holt Renfrew, but they’re people of color).
by The Real Canadian April 25, 2022
Get the Pretty Womaned mug.Tomi Lahren is just another dumb blonde who has only gotten ahead in life because of her looks. She makes a complete and total fool of herself in public, saying stupid things that insult reasonable people. Tomi Lahren is proof that you don't need a brain to succeed on TV, just a pretty face, great legs and an empty head.
Every time he watches Tomi Lahren, my dirty old man for a grandpa gets a woody. If this keeps up, then I need to throw the TV set out.
by The Real Canadian February 27, 2017
Get the Tomi Lahren mug.A secretive, hot-looking office skank who sleeps her way to the top, almost always with married men. Her only qualifications for a high-paying job? Working as a model and looking like one, too.
I have two degrees and could only find a job pushing boxes along a conveyor belt, yet that bimbo Hoe Hicks could get a high paying job with zero qualifications! WTF?
by The Real Canadian May 05, 2018
Get the Hoe Hicks mug.Pioneering, but forgotten, 1950’s and 1960’s shock jock Joe Pyne called cigarettes this, being resigned to his chain smoking habit. (He died of lung cancer in 1970, aged 45). These days, coffin nails could mean three things:
1. Long, squared off manicures in the shape of an old school coffin;
2. French fries because they’re unhealthy to begin with; and
3. Cigarettes.
1. Long, squared off manicures in the shape of an old school coffin;
2. French fries because they’re unhealthy to begin with; and
3. Cigarettes.
How could Miranda type with those ugly coffin nails in her way?
No wonder why Albert is so fat, he eats that big carton of coffin nails with chili and cheese every day for lunch.
The Surgeon General has determined that smoking coffin nails is dangerous to your health.
No wonder why Albert is so fat, he eats that big carton of coffin nails with chili and cheese every day for lunch.
The Surgeon General has determined that smoking coffin nails is dangerous to your health.
by The Real Canadian September 24, 2020
Get the Coffin Nails mug.One of Donald Trump's many unflattering nicknames, Cheetolini is a portmanteau of Cheetos (which bear Trump's unnatural orange skin color) and Italian fascist/Hitler ally Benito Mussolini.
Cheetolini's buddies like little girls, too.
How would Cheetolini like it if he's locked in a cage like these migrants at ICE detention centers?
How would Cheetolini like it if he's locked in a cage like these migrants at ICE detention centers?
by The Real Canadian July 20, 2019
Get the Cheetolini mug.