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The Poison Dwarf's definitions

The Inflatable Pig

Any self obsessed individual that jogs and wobbles in increasingly desperate attempts to create an illusion of fitness whilst shrouded in a layer of all concealing black lycra.
Regard mi bredren Simon; him gwan all The Inflatable Pig stylie..
by The Poison Dwarf October 31, 2011
mugGet the The Inflatable Pigmug.

fukazi

an expression used to describe the failure of a system to operate or a project to go according to plan
"Wayne's laptop has gone fukazi and shut down yet again! I fear that if our IT tech fails yet agaiin to rectify the problem, then he will suffer consequential problems when Wayne catches him and forcibly inserts the faulty hardware in his rectum"

Rectum? Didn't do em much good......
by The Poison Dwarf July 15, 2010
mugGet the fukazimug.

phatbloke

Used in irony, a derogatory term that can be used to cause a seemingly fit individual to question their own set of hitherto confirmed values and beliefs without proper cause. Extreme caution should be exercised; the greeting ought not to be used on a regular basis as repeated reminders might leading to eating disorders or bouts of over exercise, leading to unwanted side effects, such as hair loss, saddle rash, jogger's nipple or a fetish for wearing padded lycra clothing and ultimately self abuse.
I greeted Neddy this morning using the term 'Phatbloke' as a form of informal address. Unfortunaly however, it appears to have caused him to be consumed by guilt and loss of self-esteem. As a consequence he's left work early to go for a swim and a bike ride. I fear that he will truly and totally fuck himself severely and now am remorseful for my careless and frivolous actions.
by The Poison Dwarf August 4, 2010
mugGet the phatblokemug.

Soapy Tit Wank

in this context, used to describe the inane and vacant expression sometimes appearing upon an individual's countenance, suggesting that they are unable to focus or concentrate on current events owing to a preoccupation or pervious misdemeanour involving some form of deviant activity
Andrew, you've gone all Soapy Tit Wank again; will you please just get a grip, a life and a proper haircut, or just fuck off home, will you?
by The Poison Dwarf July 15, 2010
mugGet the Soapy Tit Wankmug.

nobtap

A genial expression of close affilliation best expressed by unexpectedly tapping a friend, relative or associate in the genital region, with the back of one's hand - usually with the intent of causing either mild temporary discomfort or pain. However, this can escalate over a period of time into a situation in which the 'nobtap' might be performed at the most inconvenient or inopportune moment, with the intention of causing maximum embarassment. Any affected response (or rather lack of one) from the tappee might be insinuated as reflecting their prowess or endurance, causing even greater anxiety for the tapper in the form of reciprocal events yet to come.
That little fuck Simon nobtapped me in the jewels when I was on the phone, really made my eyes water. I'd have twatted him right back but I fear that he enjoys any form of bodily contact, no matter how perverse.....
by The Poison Dwarf July 10, 2010
mugGet the nobtapmug.

knowledge knob

An individual who appears to know the answer to everything, or to be sufficiently well versed in the art of bullshitting to give the illusion that they do. Over time such individuals can become highly revered in society, attaining influential positions and status.
Employee 1 - "Beardie, you old fuckwitt, what does this document mean?"

Employee 2 - "Haa Harrr - fuck only knows, why don't you go and ask Mooj? He's a right old knowledge knob, and no mistake.. qualiteeeeee!"
by The Poison Dwarf August 3, 2010
mugGet the knowledge knobmug.

poofarty

A mildly noxious fart that lingers and contains a medium degree of humidity
Whoa, I've just copped a niff of that poofarty that Markie left behind.…
by The Poison Dwarf July 5, 2010
mugGet the poofartymug.

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