We're off to see the toilet

A take on the brief jingle, "We're off to see the wizard" from the movie, "The Wizard of Oz".
Sung when you're on your way to the bathroom to take a plop (leave a shit, go poo-poo, lay a log, etc.)

♪ We're off to see the toilet, ♪
♪ The wonderful toliet bowl! ♪

Note the spelling of the word toilet in the second verse; it is pronounced, "toa LYE'it" in order for it to have three syllables.

by Telephony May 22, 2016

holio

How Beavis from MTV's Beavis and Butt-Head might say the word, "hole" esp. when suffixed to something e.g. bunghole, cornhole, wormhole, posthole digger, etc,

I am cornholio! I need TP for my postholio digger because I don't want my bungholio to get a holio and end up going down a wormholio!

by Telephony May 31, 2017

brite

How a faggot would spell the word, "bright".

{Seen on a pee-cee demo by TDM in 2014}

A ? TO EVERYONE: ONLY A FAGGOT WOULD REPLACE "GHT" WITH "TE". .. EX. LIGHT AND LITE. BRIGHT AND BRITE. WHAT IS YOUR GUY'S GAY INCEST WITH THE "TE" COMBO?

by Telephony January 13, 2017

diarrhea of the keyboard

Similar to the phrase diarrhea of the mouth, but done exclusively via computer.
A person afflicted with diarrhea of the keyboard may send frequent, very lengthy emails, post multiple very long daily updates to his or her blog or website, or clog up internet BBSs (forums (or even fora if you want to be an ass about it).

{Tony}: When you're a computer geek playing games and invading dungeons, Jethro just doesn't cut it.

{Abby}: This guy has diarrhea of the keyboard. His blog must be 1,000 pages long.

by Telephony April 25, 2017

faxicide

The deliberate destruction of a facsimile (fax) machine.

Hey!!! Jimbo finally committed first degree faxicide on that stupid fax machine that's always spitting toner at us!!!

by Telephony January 17, 2011

douchepail

A douchepail is some complete and total asshaberdasher who exhibits more douchebaggery than a douchebag, but less than a douchebucket.
The logic here is that a pail is generally smaller than a bucket.

Linda is such a fucking douchepail for stuffing up all of the shitbowls in Dorm C with Scottowels!

by Telephony February 23, 2021

boom!

A grossly-overused word often shouted as an exclamation to an otherwise ordinary sentence.

{The douche on the Mercari commercial}: All I do is snap a few pics, add a description, and boom! It's listed.

by Telephony February 05, 2020