Skip to main content

Telephony's definitions

Faggot Cat

A parody of the song, "Robot Cat" by Logan Whitehurst
On Channel 27 at a quarter to three,

I saw the craziest thing that I ever did see
No cash, no check, no C.O.D.,

so I called them with my credit card, quick as could be
Nobody better get in my way

I got the package in the mail today!
I popped all the bubble wrap and threw it away

Now I'm learning Japanese so I can read what the instructions say

There was a bag of nuts and bolts and screws

It didn't say which screwdriver to use
I don't know what the radiation warning's about,

but hey, that's okay; I can figure it out!
Four legs, rubber bands, sprockets and gears

Laser beam eyes and microphone ears
Put it all together; what did I see?

I saw a faggot cat looking right at me

Well, it slices, it dices, it catches the mices

It's got a stock ticker with the Wall Street prices
Knows how to sew, cook, play the guitar

Say, it even put a new transmission in my car
It's got a titanium cranium, chip in the brainium

Pentium? Best representium
Pour in the eggs, milk, syrup, and flour,

'cause the faggot cat needs pancake power

When I say fag, you say got. Fag, got, fag, got.
When I say got, you say cat. Got, cat, got, cat.
Word to the F to the A to the double-G to the GOT to the C-A-T
So when I say Faggot, you say cat. Faggot, cat, faggot, cat
So when I say Faggot, you say cat. Faggot, cat, faggot, caaaaaaat
by Telephony May 29, 2016
mugGet the Faggot Cat mug.

dooshes

A fairly common misspelling of the word, "douches"
In fact, some computer speech synthesis programs require one to use this spelling, or else it comes out sounding like, "dowchez".
{Brief program typed on the Commodore 64 computer running the SAM (Software Automated Mouth) speech synthesis program}

0 reciter
1 say "he drinks Massengill brand post-menstrual disposable dooshes."
2 end
by Telephony June 1, 2016
mugGet the dooshes mug.

easy as 3.14159

Easy as π -- another way of saying the phrase, "easy as pie".
Ironing with the Brown & Deckor EP-600 iron is as easy as 3.14159.
It glides effortlessly across the board and removes wrinkles lickety-split!
by Telephony June 2, 2016
mugGet the easy as 3.14159 mug.

ear pollution

Very similar to noise pollution; ear pollution is generally regarded as music that is audible to a listener who's taste in musical genres differs greatly from the music currently playing.

For example, a metal song (such as by Anthrax or Metallica) playing within earshot of a listener of adult contemporary or country western music playing rather loudly when the listener is a metalhead would be considered by that listener as ear pollution.
Turn that gosh darn-diddly-arn ear pollution down willya?!? I'm trying to get some Kenny Rogers in over here!!!
by Telephony May 3, 2016
mugGet the ear pollution mug.

piss weasel

Plain & simple: another name for the penis.
{Seen on a BBS about wheelchairs and scooters -- in its, "Daily Check-In" thread}

As I did yesterday & the day before, I'll kindly dispense with the “{vulgar slang term for male piss weasel (six letters, starts with 'P' and ends with “R", rhymes with “wrecker" {P3K3R})} stuck in the {slang term for wall-mounted porcelain urinal (ten letters, starts with “W" and ends with “T", doesn't rhyme with anything {walltoliet})}" text today.
by Telephony May 10, 2016
mugGet the piss weasel mug.

garbage mouth

Means the same as potty mouth, toliet tongue, sewer mouth, etc. That is to say, some assclown who cusses at inappropriate times.
Rhino clit? That's disgusting! That's horrible! You kiss your mother with that mouth, you...you eat with that mouth? Garbage mouth!!!
by Telephony October 9, 2016
mugGet the garbage mouth mug.

kark it

I wonder what happens when your local Sea World equivalent has a killer whale kark it?
by Telephony October 9, 2016
mugGet the kark it mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email