A rock band that continues to frustrate pompous critics by actually living up to the hype. The White Stripes have always produced quality records, but in recent years have released three classics in a row ("White Blood Cells", "Elephant", and the newest, "Get Behind Me Satan").
"Red Rain", "My Doorbell", and "Take, Take, Take". Three great tracks off the newest record by The White Stripes. If you think those songs suck, you don't like rock music. Period.
by Squid Wrangler September 16, 2005
A member of the tremendous battalion of lame New Jersey post-hardcore/power pop/blargh/pseudo-genre bending radio-friendly over-produced bands that have recently broken into the American mainstream in an unexpected manner. One of the many bands who are worshipped by legions of former preps who now wear studded belts, Chuck Taylors, and check their Myspace account every six minutes. Fans of My Chemical Romance are usually in-between everything. They're too "refined" to like Linkin Park, Korn, and other ultra-mainstream angst-peddlers but too dense and flat to really do much more than haphazardly dabble in bands that are somewhat more challenging to get into, such as pre-"Dark Side of the Moon" Pink Floyd and Sonic Youth.
My Chemical Romance is mainly at home in combining the sad-sack tendencies of emo lyrics and the overbearing self-absorption found therein (yes I know they're not emo you fucking idiots, emo is a very specific style of music that for all practical purposes has been dead for a few years. But you're truly a moron if you don't think they at least borrow some elements of that genre) with the overdone theatrics of prog rock and metal while having absolutely none of the virtuosity associated with those genres. Makes use of the same limp musicianship that is present in every other generic "dynamic" or "emotional" (short for "not really good at anything") rock band currently making 16 year old girls with glasses and acne cream their pants across the country.
Speaking of their lyrics, this band is nothing special when compared to their peers while absolutely awful compared to somewhat decent bands. One of the "good songs" another person mentioned in another definition contains the following lyrics:
" And if they get me and the sun goes down into the ground
And if they get me take this spike to my heart and
And if they get me and the sun goes down
And if they get me take this spike and
You put the spike in my heart
And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right off our bones
And then as razor sharp white teeth rip out our necks I saw you there
Someone call the doctor, someone get me to a church
Where they can pump this venom gaping hole
And you must keep your soul like a secret in your throat
And if they come and get me
You put the spike in my heart"
Good God. Nothing but lame, weak metaphors about hearts, souls, secrets, gaping holes in all three, and other asinine, pretentious bullshit that is showcased in most songs in this God-forsaken genre. Overblown, meandering pablum that doesn't really even mean anything.
My Chemical Romance is mainly at home in combining the sad-sack tendencies of emo lyrics and the overbearing self-absorption found therein (yes I know they're not emo you fucking idiots, emo is a very specific style of music that for all practical purposes has been dead for a few years. But you're truly a moron if you don't think they at least borrow some elements of that genre) with the overdone theatrics of prog rock and metal while having absolutely none of the virtuosity associated with those genres. Makes use of the same limp musicianship that is present in every other generic "dynamic" or "emotional" (short for "not really good at anything") rock band currently making 16 year old girls with glasses and acne cream their pants across the country.
Speaking of their lyrics, this band is nothing special when compared to their peers while absolutely awful compared to somewhat decent bands. One of the "good songs" another person mentioned in another definition contains the following lyrics:
" And if they get me and the sun goes down into the ground
And if they get me take this spike to my heart and
And if they get me and the sun goes down
And if they get me take this spike and
You put the spike in my heart
And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right off our bones
And then as razor sharp white teeth rip out our necks I saw you there
Someone call the doctor, someone get me to a church
Where they can pump this venom gaping hole
And you must keep your soul like a secret in your throat
And if they come and get me
You put the spike in my heart"
Good God. Nothing but lame, weak metaphors about hearts, souls, secrets, gaping holes in all three, and other asinine, pretentious bullshit that is showcased in most songs in this God-forsaken genre. Overblown, meandering pablum that doesn't really even mean anything.
by Squid Wrangler May 11, 2005
Conservative rallying cry that has little to no basis in history or reality for that matter as stated. If by "nothing" you mean that Bill Clinton never dragged us into the kind of disaster George W. Bush did with his poorly-planned and executed mega-quagmire, then you'd be right on the money. However, if by "nothing" you mean the time his anti-terror legislation (Omnibus Anti-Terrorism Act of 1995) was cock-blocked by the GOP-controlled Congress, when his assertions that Al-Quaeda in general and Osama Bin Laden in particular were serious threats were balked at by many Republicans, when his proposal to create a department dealing primarily with homeland security was rejected, and when his warnings that Islamic extremism was going to be the new threat of our age were ignored, then you've probably been paying more attention than most of America.
Bill Clinton's anti-terror and homeland defense ideas weren't ahead of their time as much as they were shot down due to partisan bullshit from Republicans. And Democrats are supposed to be the obstructionists?
by Squid Wrangler July 31, 2005
Fake, totally unintersesting porn site that has become extremely popular in some bizarre, metaphysical manner. Often credited with single-handedly starting the God-awful trend of "reality" porn sites. Follows the adventures of a handful of bad actors and general wankers employed by porn juggernaut Ox Entertainment. Can typically be seen in and around South Florida paying fat, used-up, coke-shooting skanks $700 to ride around in a van and get reamed by one of the ugly freaks of nature that resides therein. Even then, if you dare conjure up any semblence of an erection, it's usually quelled by a certain wheezing, giggling, cackling, totally obnoxious bastard going by the name of Dirty Sanchez. Very little is known about this mysterious individual, other than the fact that he insists on cracking bad jokes the entire time and seems to get off on random, amateurish zooming and panning. A bunch of equally stupid and low-quality porn sites that feature many of the same girls along with the same lame-brained actors are included as extras for those deluded enough to actually buy a subscription to this shitopia. Even worse than Milf Hunter.
"Hey baby gurrrr hahahahaha wanna like ga hahahaha like come ride with us? Hahahaha, dude, dude, dude!!"
-Dirty Sanchez
-Dirty Sanchez
by Squid Wrangler March 24, 2005
Generous old boll-weevil Democrat who praised John Kerry as an "authentic national hero" and said that he was "one of the party's best-known and greatest leaders-and a good friend" as well as asserting that "John has worked to strengthen our military, reform public education, boost the economy and protect the environment" at a dinner in his home state of Georgia in the year 2001. Thanks for the kind words, Zell.
I sure hope Zell Miller never goes on a half-coherent tirade at the Republican National Convention and betrays his own party as well as John Kerry, whom he has referred to as a good friend.
by Squid Wrangler March 28, 2005
Jewish comic who makes a living by screaming his head off about things that everyone already knows anyway. Lewis Black is occasionally very funny and thought-provoking in his approach but some of his jokes miss the mark and his angry persona wears off on a viewer over time. His piece on the Daily Show far outshines his stand-up specials because they're just long enough to be entertaining without being grating. Can best be thought of as a stand-up version of Maddox. A tad overrated in many of the same areas as the late Mitch Hedberg.
Although I prefer his segments on the Daily Show, Lewis Black's best stand-up effort in my opinion is "The End."
by Squid Wrangler April 13, 2005
A right-wing blog run by Jesse and John, two psychopaths with a bizarre love for the Bush administration and complete, cess-ridden hatred for the left. One of the main draws of the site is the fact that Jesse is 15 years old and has parents that seemingly don't mind their son publishing slanderous and outright threatening tirades on the internet. His age definitely shines through as his articles are usually rife with spelling and grammar errors while typically sporting an extremely juvenile and immature tone about them.
The Jesee Factor usually features baseless and extremely vulgar attacks against liberals and Democrats that often fall apart once further analyzed. In one memorable entry, John claimed that there is much more oil in Alaska than there is in Iraq and as such, oil could not have been among the reasons to spark that particular conflict. A quick visit to the Energy Information Administration website, a branch of the US Department of Energy, proved him to be almost pitifully wrong. Not only that, the number he used to describe the amount of oil in Alaska (16 billion barrels) is the most optimistic one available, frequently contradicted by many experts, and a number often cited by a pro-drilling Alaskan senator alone.
They often do not include sources for their most controversial and damning assertions (stating that the Kerry family bought $500,000 in Halliburton stock, for instance) and usually resort to ad hominem attacks along with homophobic slurs to take up space in their rants. The writing often resembles that of a third-tier Maddox ripoff rather than the biting social and political commentary they were no doubt aiming for.
The Jesse Factor is more or less an extremely annoying variant of what is becoming a run-of-the mill internet presence: crazy assholes who think they know everything publishing their half-coherent drivel for everyone to see.
The Jesee Factor usually features baseless and extremely vulgar attacks against liberals and Democrats that often fall apart once further analyzed. In one memorable entry, John claimed that there is much more oil in Alaska than there is in Iraq and as such, oil could not have been among the reasons to spark that particular conflict. A quick visit to the Energy Information Administration website, a branch of the US Department of Energy, proved him to be almost pitifully wrong. Not only that, the number he used to describe the amount of oil in Alaska (16 billion barrels) is the most optimistic one available, frequently contradicted by many experts, and a number often cited by a pro-drilling Alaskan senator alone.
They often do not include sources for their most controversial and damning assertions (stating that the Kerry family bought $500,000 in Halliburton stock, for instance) and usually resort to ad hominem attacks along with homophobic slurs to take up space in their rants. The writing often resembles that of a third-tier Maddox ripoff rather than the biting social and political commentary they were no doubt aiming for.
The Jesse Factor is more or less an extremely annoying variant of what is becoming a run-of-the mill internet presence: crazy assholes who think they know everything publishing their half-coherent drivel for everyone to see.
"I heard that Jesse of the Jesse Factor is a Libertarian. Well excuse me all to hell for being a Democrat, looks like this kid sides with the real winners."
by Squid Wrangler March 21, 2005