Farm

A workplace for a guy who wants to fuck chickens but seem legit and trustworthy/hard working.

Your resume speaks for itself, you were hired help on the farm, you worked hard. You didn't explain why a few other workers told me about what you did to the chickens when I spoke to them as a reference. They didn't tell you they caught you Joe, but they did catch you. Did you think nobody would find out about the chickens?

by Solid Mantis December 20, 2017

Super bowl LV

Tom Brady is back looking for another one, the guy has been winning super bowls since some of us were in high school. He's also weathered a pretty boy, metrosexual image and come out on top more than a few times. Last years win against the 49ers wasn't an easy one for the Chiefs, but this one is likely to require a bit more creativity, since shutting Tom Brady's offense down over several quarters isn't likely. He's something of a football weapons specialist, if not the best to ever do what he does. The minute somebody thinks he's their grandfather is the one he uses it to pick the other guys apart.

Super bowl LV is going to be tougher for the Chiefs, they must sense that.

by Solid Mantis January 27, 2021

Aerobics music

Music with no heart.

Aerobics music again? That's the 87th time this week, you're slowly driving me crazy with that shit.

by Solid Mantis December 02, 2020

Getaway helicopter

There are people who do it that way. They don't get away in a car they get away in damn helicopter!

They left the roof of the building they hit in the getaway helicopter.

by Solid Mantis May 05, 2017

Spider sense

A sixth sense that tingles when there's something else wrong with someone or something.

Spidey-I think there's something else wrong with the guy, my spider sense is tingling.
Other guy-Something else wrong with the guy besides the alien he just gave birth to out of his stomach? What do you know that I don't know spider man?

by Solid Mantis August 24, 2018

Friendly foe

The nicest enemy you could ever meet.

He/she was a friendly foe, and always had a smile and an insult or five to go with it. He/she was the nicest guy/girl that wanted somebody dead you'd ever meet, and pretended to be the guy's friend to the point that he almost believed it.

by Solid Mantis November 13, 2020

Raw sewage

People have swam in raw sewage before, and turned out okay. Still, the news tells people in South Florida do not walk around in the shit filled floodwaters from Tropical Storm Eta, it's dangerous. Just what people need, to be fed something else to get paranoid about, since the coronavirus didn't seem to get enough people paranoid.

South Florida resident on news- Raw sewage mixed in with the floodwater, that's other people's shit, it smells horrible, that's how I knew there was sewage in the water. I'm not going in that.

by Solid Mantis November 12, 2020