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RandyRhoads84's definitions

Up the bumble

When you meet a girl on the bumble dating app and successfully secure anal.
Michael: What did you do last night Lawrence?
Lawrence: I met up with this eastern european bird from bumble and took her up the arse.
Michael: Up the bumble, The holy grail!
by RandyRhoads84 November 27, 2020
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CR Ho

Officially known as a Contract Research Organisation (CRO), though informally referred to as CR HO in pharma.
Pharma big cheese: 10 people died in the phase III trial! What's going on?
Pharma subordinate: Let's blame it on the CR Ho, those bitches are contracted to run the trial.
Pharms big cheese: I like it. It's about time they got a dick slap.
by RandyRhoads84 November 6, 2020
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Hotel Rwanda

A 2004 film, also a sarcastic name for the refugee camp that some asylum seekers in the UK will be sent to in Rwanda.
Steve W: Where are Jitnesh and his family?
Michael C: They've been sent to Hotel Rwanda.
Steve W: About time! The Rwanda scheme had cost the taxpayer hundreds of millions, with no asylum seekers deported
Michael C: Yep. I hear that in the Hotel Rwanda, you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
by RandyRhoads84 January 17, 2024
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Strimming

Trimming anal hair so thick that a strimmer has to be used, instead of conventional means
Michael: 'What did you get up to last night Steve W?'
Steve W: 'I strimmed this bird, initially we tried anal with copious lube, but even that couldn't circumnavigate the anal forest. Tried to force my cock in but couldn't see my wood for the anal forest, so had to do some Strimming instead'
by RandyRhoads84 December 25, 2016
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Capitalist tennis

Where two tennis players start on an 'even footing', and the strongest player serves first. Each time the weakest player loses a game, they have to down a double gin & tonic, thus progressively getting weaker.
Maria and Michael played capitalist tennis yesterday, Maria ended up losing and was very drunk by the end!
by RandyRhoads84 June 4, 2024
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Tea Tree Oiled

The art of waxing your shaft with tea tree oil, and strumming yourself to ecstasy before the burn sets in.
Michael: What did you do last night Steve, the usual pit noodle and wank 1-2?
Steve W: Actually I spiced things up and tea tree oiled my Johnson
by RandyRhoads84 May 29, 2020
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Ass. Consultant

Abbreviation for 'Associate Consultant', some bullshit job title to give younger employees a false sense of hope that their job means something. Commonly found in rural consultancies in St. Ives. Sometimes loaned out sexually to clients to secure deals.
Client: 'The proposal is pretty good, but the quote is too high'
Hobb Knob: 'Have one of my ass. consultants for the night, not the yank though, he's spoiled goods and has an arse like a grapefruit'
Client: 'Deal, we'll sign off in the morning'
by RandyRhoads84 December 25, 2016
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