5 definition by QuantumToaster

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The act of getting up at three in the morning, putting the cereal of your choice in a bowl and pouring vodka and milk in it.
Eating it, and drinking the rest of the vodka, you get dressed drunk off your ass and go to work in the shittiest clothes you have with no coat in cold weather, and you come home after finding out it's Sunday.
Nikolai: Gah, man, I had a Russian Morning today, almost got ran over trying to go to work.
Dmitry: Dude.
It's Sunday at five in the morning.
by QuantumToaster October 08, 2014

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1. A flammable jelly that sticks to materials. Used in flamethrowers and bombs during World War 2 and the Vietnam War. It was outlawed in 1980.

2. Sticky food that is burning hot (i.e cheese or poptart filling) that gets stuck in your mouth and burns the shit outta your mouth.

3. Diarrhea caused by eating various Mexican and spicy foods.
1. Dear god, the videos of napalm strikes are horrifying. I couldn't sleep for days.

2. OH MY GOD YOU MONSTER, WHY DID YOU NOT COOL THIS PIE BEFORE YOU SERVED IT?

3. I was on the shitter for an hour and a half straight napalming the toilet after that chili contest at work.
by QuantumToaster August 13, 2015

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1. A species of bird
2. Most commonly used as slang for breast.
3. A nickname for someone who is incredibly stupid.
1. There's a tit over there. Better add it to my notebook.
2. Look at dem titties...
3. You are a one-of-a-kind tit.
by QuantumToaster January 11, 2016

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A super-annoying insect mothereffer that is out all summer, unless there is heavy wind. These things are the dicks of the sky and if you see one get the hell out of there. Their sting feels like having a hot pin dipped in bleach and putting salt on the wound.
Did I mention they can sting more than once?
1. Ah crap, a wasp is nesting in my garage and it's buddies stung my arms 2 times each. I am in so much pain.
by QuantumToaster June 04, 2014

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The time a side hoe forces his man to go with her to the mall when he has a date with his main bitch.
How am I supposed to netflix and chill when my side hoe is putting me through the mallocaust?
by QuantumToaster January 11, 2016

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