Neighborhood grandma: In order to minimize children's sorrow at having you leave them after Saturday afternoon playtime, it's often best to just briefly say, "Bye, kids!" and then quickly shut the door without further adieu
by QuacksO January 28, 2020
Tricked into thinking you’re getting real bamboo when it’s actually just some cheap crappy imitation (think, using dried marsh-grass blades or cattail leaves for creating a basket, lamp-shade, or mat/curtain, instead of da genuine natural-plastic woven slats).
I hired a fly-by-night landscaper to plant a “tubular grass” fringe around my house, but the lyin’ shyster just stuck in a weedy thicket of Japanese knotweed --- I got seriously bamboo-zled on THAT deal!
by QuacksO September 03, 2018
Snarky definition for da space-hogging and gas-guzzling RV dat always seemed to be urgently pleading for some (usually very costly!) resource, such as fuel, motor oil, coolant, etc.
If you converted a Winnebego into a "Whinnybego", it might not need expensive oil or gas, but you'd hafta shell out big bucks for hay and oats.
by QuacksO October 27, 2024
One-half of a paradidgem.
It takes twenty paranickels --- or ten paradimes --- to make a paradollar. Da concept --- and da math --- is very simple, so don't make a bleepin' PARADOX about it, or you might need a "pair o' docs" --- or at least a pair o' MEDICS in a milder-case scenario --- to handle said meltdown.
by QuacksO February 02, 2025
The standard bu**s**t reply that a professed religious-freak half-heartedly tries to appease you with whenever you ask a "tough" theology-related question that he does not actually have a "ready" or "satisfactory" answer for, such as, "Well, if God truly loves Mankind, why does He allow bad things to happen to good people?", or, "Yeah, right --- well, tell me this, then --- if your 'perfect God' is so kind and compassionate and merciful, why did He allow my {some beloved relative/friend who became deceased way too early in life} to die?!"
I get sooooo sick ‘n’ tired of hearing that stupid-a** wooden-smile-expressioned response of "Well, that's something best left up to Jesus Christ," whenever I indignantly fire back a perfectly logical question at a local Bible-blabber who is trying to "bring me into the true fold” --- hey, I'm not interested in waiting for "Jesus Christ" to answer my question "all in His good time"!! I want an actual straight solid definite answer --- and one that truly makes logical sense to me --- RIGHT AWAY, not in FIFTY BLEEPIN' YEARS or however long I'm sposta hafta wait to "receive divine enlightenment”! How da HECK can a supposedly-enlightened "born-aginner" except me to wanna listen to his b**l-crap preachings or accept his beliefs if he himself can't even come up with a proper answer to a simple query that a non-believer would logically ask him? Zheee-yeeesh --- he isn’t even following the “old Scout motto” of “be prepared”!!
by QuacksO November 12, 2018
Says here in da monthly brewsletter dat da employees are forbidden to drink on the job; otherwise they would hafta also publish a monthly "bruiseletter" of all da injuries from tipsy workers' drunkenly blunderin' into and fallin' over stuff while performing their daily tasks!
by QuacksO June 05, 2019
A word to describe what you do when you casually figure in your own mind that you can hold someone financially-accountable in court.
During an episode of AFV, Daisy Fuentes and John Fugelsang have a lively discussion about consumer-rights with regards to product-warranties. Daisy performs some amazingly-hilarious rolling/crossing of her lovely big bright eyes during the conversation, making John look like an even bigger crtybaby-idiot than he is already trying to portray himself as (he wonders if he has any legal recourse from injuries suffered from his having brainlessly sat on a copying-machine and getting glass-lacerations in his a**); Daisy's advice to him should probably be that he should not assueme anything in instances like this.
by QuacksO February 28, 2019