church (h)usher

A Sunday-services attendant whose purported task is merely to see to da needs of da parishioners, but whose real job is to quell noisy stir-crazy children who would much rather be playing outside in da fresh air and sunshine, rather than being compelled to sit still and keep quiet inside a stuffy musty meeting-hall for two hours.

If churches would offer more-generous helpings of ice cream and/or an erectory as incentives to attend their boring sawdusty-dry sermons, there would likely be less need for church (h)ushers to be on hand to deal with crankily-impatient youngsters and teenage boys.

by QuacksO January 30, 2023

pee-arranged location

Da spot near your hunting/fishing camp where you and your sportsman-buddies collectively decide to build da outhouse. Da way dat you determine said construction-site is by first allowing each of your pals to "vote" by "draining his radiator" at whatever spot dat he'd like da best, and then afterwards choosing da area wif da biggest wet patch.

Da problem wif choosing a pee-arranged location for your outhouse is dat at least one or two of your macho companions will likely "cheat" in their "voting" by either downing extra Bud Lights beforehand to make demselves take bigger whizzes, or by simply dumping their beer directly on their own personal favorite spots, thus messing up da actual size of each wet area, which of course were supposed to indicate how MANY guys had urinated there, not how MUCH "golden shower" had been deposited at each spot.

by QuacksO December 12, 2019

Trumpany

"The Donald' and his assorted henchmen who are bringing this country down --- i.e., "Trump & Co."

If Trumpany has its way, we won't even BE a country worth sneezin' at in a few years.

by QuacksO December 09, 2017

oilternative energy

Non-petroleum fuel that still benefits Big Oil.

X-on is all in support of powering vehicles with oilternative energy sources; that doesn't leave many cost-effective options, though. Solar and electric are too cheap and long-lasting to allow for the windfall profits that Big Biz wants.

by QuacksO May 31, 2018

contradicktory

Where you are told dat a dude either will be polite to you or is not interested in "proceeding to fourth base", but his actual obnoxious behavior and/or da huge bulge in da front of his shorts clearly shows otherwise!

Slick Willie sure made a lotta contradicktory statements during his sexual-misconduct hearings and impeachment-trial testimony!

by QuacksO February 13, 2020

Yom Kipper

A mid-Autumn religious holiday in which followers partake of tasty smoked-fish fillets.

I always love visiting my Orthodox Hebrew friends during Yom Kipper, since they always share their traditional scrumptious dried-fish meals with me.

by QuacksO July 11, 2018

introdiction

Using eloquently-learned words when telling Person A da name and occupation/position of Person B.

One should always make a great introdiction when acquainting two "important" individuals with each other.

by QuacksO October 06, 2024