saddle-soap

A hunorous term for personal lubricant --- a warming and/or soothing slippery liquid/gel that is applied to the "contact areas" prior to intercourse, so that both the guy and the gal get a more comfy "ride".
Hottie #1: Yo! Why the groaning and crossed legs, Girl?
Hottie #2: Oh, it's just my new boyfriend, hunny --- he's so "big" and enthusiastic that I always feel sore "down there" for a while after we "do it".
Hottie #1: Aw, major bummer, sweetie --- you guys shoulda used saddle-soap!
by QuacksO January 11, 2015
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elevator music

"Ear-candy" spoken by a gal that makes a guy get an "elevation" between his legs.
She: Hey, whoa --- what's with the huge hard-on? All I said was that it's too hot today for me to put on underwear!
He: Heck, Gorgeous --- that's elevator music enough to my ears!
by QuacksO August 27, 2013
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de-hyperventilate

Refers to what you do immediately following a super-stressful/worrisome period/event (like an emergency repair or tense/uncertain appointment with someone) which you have wheezingly struggled thtough without mishap (thankfully!); you are thus obliged to "deflate and regroup" in exhausted relief afterwards.
I was shaking in my shoes all during my 20-mile drive home due to some malfunctioning of my car's engine, but luckily I did make it back without incident, and then after I'd sat there in my driveway and de-hyperventilated for a few, I checked under da hood to ferret out da issues, and was immensely relieved to see dat it was all fairly-minor stuff dat I could fix myself.
by QuacksO August 26, 2019
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Igorgasm

Getting off from either listening to Stravinsky or reading about Gothic villains.
I got multiple Igorgasms from watching "Young Frankenstein" and then listening to an entire boxed-set record-album of Russian classical music.
by QuacksO January 24, 2022
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Dewey Decibel System

A calibrated scale of sound-pressure-level used to measure the degree of ambient noise inside a library. Named after the infamous Thomas E. Dewey and his thunderously-cacophonous presidential campaign against Harry Truman.
The noise-level that's acceptable for inside a library is no more than 35dB on the Dewey Decibel System .
by QuacksO February 24, 2017
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Tiger Irons

The "heavy duty" evil twin to the famous pro-golf player.
Nobody wants to caddy for Tiger Irons, since all of his clubs are super-weighty metal-headed drivers --- no sissy wimpy "tree-fiber" drivers for HIM, thank you very much!
by QuacksO May 18, 2019
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Statue of Limitations

The little-known "sister" statue of Lady Liberty, this monument is a testament to our legal-system's "escape hatch" loophole which allows wrongdoers to be let off the hook for anything other than super-violent/serious crimes if they can just lay low for two or six years.
Just as our most famous bronze monument in NYC harbor has attracted less-than-savory aliens over the centuries, our infamous Statue of Limitations is a magnet for foreign criminals on the lam.
by QuacksO July 12, 2018
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