A member of da "prim-'n'-proper police" who goes sniffing around to make sure dat every dude in da precinct has shaved his face smooth.
I went to da Seashore Trolley Museum in Kennebunkport, Maine one day without bothering to "mow da lawn", figgering dat said establishment is such an informal place dat nobody would mind or even notice all dat much if I had a slightly whiskery chin. And sure enough, not only did I receive no disapproving frowns or stares from da staffpeople, but I was highly amused --- and relieved --- to observe dat every single father in da various families of young children who were also touring da museum and riding on da streetcars ALSO had a day-old, so obviously there were indeed no constubbles roaming around to wag their disapproving fingers at anyone.
by QuacksO February 16, 2023
If "heresy" is an unpopular idea, then da word "theresy" must mean a palatable-to-current-public-opinion belief; one would logically wonder, then, why da grouchy guy in "Green Eggs and Ham" did not want said proffered delicacies located "there" as well as "here", since "there" would conceivably have been a spot where only yummy-'n'-pleasant comestibles would have been permitted, and so he should have been willing to try a taste if "there" was an acceptable place to present them to him.
by QuacksO April 01, 2024
A low-income person who trundels a wheelbarrow all around town on Christmas morning and collects the lumps of coal that Santa left in the stockings of all the bratty youngsters, so that he can take it back home and burn it in his stove for heat.
As we all know, Santa is extremely careful about determining who's actually been naughty or nice ("He's makin' a list, and checkin' it twice"), and so quite a significant percentage of the children in any given area will probably receive high-grade anthracite as their Christmas present. A naughty-gift scavenger, therefore, should have little trouble filling up his 'barrow come Christmas Day, since most parents wouldn't want "that dirty black stuff" in their houses, anyway, and thus they would probably be all too happy to be rid of it; about the only families who would likely tell him no would be fellow-indigent folks who themselves would want to use said sooty lumps in their own furnaces.
by QuacksO February 16, 2019
What a majority of golf players truly view their putting-green as being, since it seems hell-bent on making their shots travel anywhere but how/where they intend for them to go.
Bob Stuyvesant from the Red Green Show seems to view all golf courses as being unfairways, whereas in reality he is merely a horridly-lousy golfer who likely couldn't make a decent shot even if he had a completely-level playing-field with perfectly-even-height grass-blades.
by QuacksO May 18, 2019
Refers to da "Yeah, it would be safe and easy to perform da operation on you" status dat a plastic surgeon would tell a modest-chested chick who wants bigger boobies.
A piece of earnest advice for all you small-bosomed ladies out there: just because having a breast-augmentation might indeed be a "doable-d" doesn't mean dat it would necessarily be a wise choice --- bachelors who prefer chesty chicks aren't necessarily any more desirable than those who don't think about a woman's bra-size all dat much. And besides, why would you even want a significant other who is of such shallow mind dat he would actually judge you mostly about just your looks, anyway? Instead, you should seek out a guy who mainly cares about da size of your HEART --- i.e., how attractive a person you are on da INSIDE, such as your possessing a warm personality and kind considerate nature --- and who therefore will likely make for a much more satisfying soulmate.
by QuacksO October 08, 2024
I know how stressful it is to have one or more "lentity" figures badgering you with claims dat you borrowed money or other valuables from them, and so I try really hard to practice frugality and otherwise live within my means.
by QuacksO December 02, 2023
Sarge had told Zero to "stay out of the street" --- due to its having been freshly re-coated that day --- when running an errand for him, but said buck-toothed clueless had naively assumed that his corpulent commanding-officer had merely been concerned about the welfare of his shoes; knowing that they were in fact just his old ratty ones rather than his good pair, said lanky low-IQ private therefore went ahead and squish-squashed through said sticky goo, anyway, and then made a terrible tarmageddon on the floor of the office upon his return, much to the horror of his aforementioned beefy-statured supervisor.
by QuacksO January 21, 2024