lol triggered

LOL triggered - when you're being both entertained and triggered simultaneously

wait WTF did I just laugh at? I'm LOL triggered here - The 'Say My Name In Every Song' comedy sketch is funny as hell but she pulls a gun on her boyfriend saying 'dont sing another bitches name nigga’ - how is this okay? If the guy was holding the gun to the woman's head people would be like TRIGGERED: woman abuse! violence against women! I’m totally LOL triggered here

by Peter Greenwall August 28, 2018

voice-prompt hell

the frustration experienced when dialling a large organization to speak to a real person about a specific query that isn't covered by the maze of multiple automated options, and / or the voice recognition system can't understand you

I just spent at least 10 minutes in voice-prompt hell trying to speak to someone about my traffic fine, only to discover at the end there's an option to press zero to speak to a real person

by Peter Greenwall July 06, 2011

obspervant

(adj.) The uncanny ability to observe your surroundings with a totally innocent yet undeniably pervy undertone. Whether it’s clocking every gym bro flexing in a tank top, side-eyeing that audaciously short skirt, or mentally cataloging every exposed tattoo in sight, you just have an eye for noticing sexiness wherever you go

Often accompanied by a running internal monologue:
“Is that even legal to wear in public?!”
“OMG, is it me, or is everyone else this obspervant?”

“I wasn’t creeping, I’m just naturally #Obspervant.”

Warning: High levels of #Obspervant behavior may lead to embarrassing slip-ups like audibly gasping at someone’s daring outfit. Proceed with caution and sunglasses.

by Peter Greenwall November 10, 2024

breaking muse

the latest amusing distraction, usually arriving by a digital medium e.g. text, e-mail forward, facebook notification, youtube etc.

e.g. 1. brb, I have breaking muse - Mike just tagged me in his photo-album 'stoned on the beach'

e.g. 2. BREAKING MUSE!! check out this youtube vid (link goes here)

e.g. 3. John is addicted to breaking muse - he constantly checks his facebook

e.g. 4. BREAKING MUSE! - Lisa just texted to say she's not coming! YAY

by Peter Greenwall February 04, 2009

Hysterical Accuracy

'dramatic purposes'; changing the facts to make your story funnier or more interesting (and possibly to dodge potential defamatory / libel lawsuits)

some of the characters names and certain locations and events have been fictionalised for hysterical accuracy

by Peter Greenwall May 14, 2011

Osknowsis

knowledge acquired subconsciously; the transfer of information from a high concentration (what you know about) to a low concentration (what you don't know), leading to a sudden solution; knowing something without knowing how you know it

e.g.1: On hiring a car and getting horribly lost, it suddenly occurred to the captain of the ship: why can't I have satellite navigation in my car? He had just invented it by Osknowsis.

e.g.2: "Dude, how do you know all the lyrics to Piano Man?"
Osknowsis - I don't remember learning them!

by Peter Greenwall February 04, 2009

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

the traumatic stress you feel between the moment you post something on the Internet and the moment somebody likes it or responds

so I post this hilarious pic of me playing air guitar and within 37 minutes I get no response. No likes, no comments. Nothing. So here I am staring blankly at my Facebook wall with a severe case of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder as I wait for somebody to like my hilarious new update

by Peter Greenwall March 11, 2013