Nutzen YerMouf's definitions
by Nutzen YerMouf May 10, 2018
Get the fascist cum bucket mug." I forgot to whipe my ass after shitting today, now I have the analitch. Nothing worse than going to itch something and getting shit under your fingernails."
by Nutzen YerMouf March 15, 2018
Get the analitch mug.The fat stupid guy at work that sucks up to the boss, spouts simplistic platitudes, and thinks he is more experienced because he has worked there 20 years but you always seem to be fixing his fuck ups.
The office chimp at work came over to help me. I just wanted him to get away from me because he annoys me and he fucks things up all the time.
"There's no 'I' in team, that's what I always say." The office chimp stated.
Just to be a dick to him and hopefully drive him away, I brought up Maureen's promotion that he was hoping to get.
"It's okay, good things come to those who wait. I will get it next time." The office chimp replied.
Jesus fucking Christ, I thought to myself. Would you just go the fuck away.
Our boss walked by, and the office chimp stopped what he was doing and fucked up the order of my documents in the process.
"How are you doing today Frank?" the office chimp said overly cheerful.
Frank answered, "Good, glad to see you helping out over here."
"Got to teach these young guys, I have been here 20 years and they can learn a lot from me. Of course the people are our most important asset too! We wouldn't be anywhere without them and we need to step in and show we appreciate them." the fucking moron office chimp said.
"There's no 'I' in team, that's what I always say." The office chimp stated.
Just to be a dick to him and hopefully drive him away, I brought up Maureen's promotion that he was hoping to get.
"It's okay, good things come to those who wait. I will get it next time." The office chimp replied.
Jesus fucking Christ, I thought to myself. Would you just go the fuck away.
Our boss walked by, and the office chimp stopped what he was doing and fucked up the order of my documents in the process.
"How are you doing today Frank?" the office chimp said overly cheerful.
Frank answered, "Good, glad to see you helping out over here."
"Got to teach these young guys, I have been here 20 years and they can learn a lot from me. Of course the people are our most important asset too! We wouldn't be anywhere without them and we need to step in and show we appreciate them." the fucking moron office chimp said.
by Nutzen YerMouf May 9, 2018
Get the office chimp mug.Ingredients:
At least one male
1 bottle of gin
1 bottle of tequila
1 bottle of vodka
1 bottle of white rum
1 12 oz can of coca-cola
1 lemon
triple sec (whatever the fuck that is)
1 large bowl
Peel and squeeze lemon into the bowl. Add gin, tequila, vodka, rum, coke, and triple sec into the bowl. Stir for 30 seconds.
Each male places their testicles in the bowl for 30 seconds. The hairier the testicles, the better.
The males then place their testicles on the face of someone else, letting them drink the concoction. Repeat until drunk.
At least one male
1 bottle of gin
1 bottle of tequila
1 bottle of vodka
1 bottle of white rum
1 12 oz can of coca-cola
1 lemon
triple sec (whatever the fuck that is)
1 large bowl
Peel and squeeze lemon into the bowl. Add gin, tequila, vodka, rum, coke, and triple sec into the bowl. Stir for 30 seconds.
Each male places their testicles in the bowl for 30 seconds. The hairier the testicles, the better.
The males then place their testicles on the face of someone else, letting them drink the concoction. Repeat until drunk.
Mary drank her Long Island tea bag with much satisfaction. They were the best tasting testicles she had ever sucked on.
by Nutzen YerMouf June 9, 2017
Get the Long Island tea bag mug.Everything in Jeff's life was great, but he had trouble focusing on his life as he was so consumed by his job caused depression. Jeff had jopression and it was making him suicidal. No matter how good or bad things were in his life outside of work, he was consumed by the feelings of hopelessness his job gave him. If left untreated it would destroy all the good things in his life and lead to full blown depression.
by Nutzen YerMouf February 17, 2018
Get the jopression mug.A person is laid out on a board elevated slightly so their head is up off the ground slightly. A cloth, such as a towel or rag, is placed over their face. A bucket is filled with urine and poured over the person's face to simulate drowning in urine. A form of sexual torture made popular in after-hours and domination clubs in Poughkeepsie, New York.
The UN voted to ban waterboarding, but the president of the United States found a work around by using Poughkeepsie Waterboarding instead. The problem was, he was the one who wanted to be Poughkeepsie Waterboarded.
by Nutzen YerMouf June 9, 2017
Get the Poughkeepsie Waterboarding mug.Rebecca decided to herpes fuck John. He had a gross blister shaft, but he was really hot. She made him wear a condom so she figured she would be safe.
Two days later her pubic hair started itching. She didn't get the herp, but she crabs.
Two days later her pubic hair started itching. She didn't get the herp, but she crabs.
by Nutzen YerMouf February 22, 2018
Get the blister shaft mug.