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When you are feeling fine then suddenly you feel the urge to poop NOW! The poop pops out of nowhere, often leaving your friends, family, or coworkers wondering why you are running to the bathroom as quick as you can. Most cases of pop-tart poop ends with barely making it to the toilet with shitting while you are pulling your pants down. Some of the worst cases end with embarrassingly hiding your underwear from your wife in the washer, and a few people wondering why the odd brown stain on the ground in the hallway.
Dan was in a meeting going over 4th quarter financials with his boss and several coworkers. Suddenly his eyes got really big and he ran out of the meeting as quick as he could. When he came back, his boss asked what was wrong.
Dan said, "A case of the pop-tart poops, I was afraid I would shit my pants."
His boss answered, "I hate it when that happens."
Dan said, "A case of the pop-tart poops, I was afraid I would shit my pants."
His boss answered, "I hate it when that happens."
by Nutzen YerMouf January 12, 2018
Get the pop-tart poop mug.Numerous stupid children from the same father or same mother that sniff glue, giggle, and say 'libtard' a lot.
Donald's first kid was pretty stupid, like Chris Farley in "Black Sheep". When he spit out a couple more and they all were just as dumb as the first, it became a Trump spawn crisis.
by Nutzen YerMouf February 14, 2018
Get the Trump spawn mug."Where is Adam?"
"You didn't hear? He snorted a bunch of meth and is now in the hospital all catharded and shit."
"You didn't hear? He snorted a bunch of meth and is now in the hospital all catharded and shit."
by Nutzen YerMouf May 9, 2018
Get the catharded mug.Eric was about to go down on Jessica when he noticed all of the blisters and scabs covering her vulva. He puked in his mouth a little and decided not to pull a herpes fuck on her, she had a scabby snatch and he didn't want to catch whatever it was she had.
by Nutzen YerMouf February 22, 2018
Get the scabby snatch mug.1) When a school or mass shooting happens in America it will always be by a person that identifies with conservative ideology - Minus Exception A.
2) Conservative media will always attempt to associate the shooter with Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton, or some other prominent person with liberal leaning ideology; often quoting the Twitter account of another person with the same name as the shooter.
3) Pictures will exist of the shooter wearing a MAGA hat or draping themselves with a confederate flag - Minus Exception A.
4) If someone stopped the shooter with a gun, conservatives will always complain about the lack of coverage on the news no matter how much coverage the news gives it.
Exception A) Shooters targeting politicians are excluded from the rule.
2) Conservative media will always attempt to associate the shooter with Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton, or some other prominent person with liberal leaning ideology; often quoting the Twitter account of another person with the same name as the shooter.
3) Pictures will exist of the shooter wearing a MAGA hat or draping themselves with a confederate flag - Minus Exception A.
4) If someone stopped the shooter with a gun, conservatives will always complain about the lack of coverage on the news no matter how much coverage the news gives it.
Exception A) Shooters targeting politicians are excluded from the rule.
Mike said, "Did you hear about that school shooting? I bet it was some libtard Antifa that dun' it."
Adam replied, "Jethro's Law, rule 1. He was most certainly not a liberal ."
Mike said, "Horse shit! I saw a Breitbart headline that talked about a post of his on Twitter praising commie Bernie Sanders...."
Adam replied, "You mean from that guy 5 states away with the same name. Yeah, I actually looked the guy up. Two different people. Here, I found a picture of him wearing a confederate flag like a cape and sporting a MAGA hat."
Adam replied, "Jethro's Law, rule 1. He was most certainly not a liberal ."
Mike said, "Horse shit! I saw a Breitbart headline that talked about a post of his on Twitter praising commie Bernie Sanders...."
Adam replied, "You mean from that guy 5 states away with the same name. Yeah, I actually looked the guy up. Two different people. Here, I found a picture of him wearing a confederate flag like a cape and sporting a MAGA hat."
by Nutzen YerMouf May 15, 2018
Get the Jethro's Law mug.Tom wanted to get revenge on his roomate Adam. So early in the morning before work, Tom pretended to be taking a shit. While in the bathroom, he grabbed Adam's toothbrush and gave it a bit of salty toothpaste.
A little while later, Adam was brushing his teeth. "Did this toothpaste taste salty to you Tom?" Adam yelled from the bathroom.
Tom giggled quietly before answering back, "I didn't notice, maybe it's the baking soda"
"You son of a bitch Tom! You put salty toothpaste on my toothbrush" Adam yelled
Tom just laughed.
A little while later, Adam was brushing his teeth. "Did this toothpaste taste salty to you Tom?" Adam yelled from the bathroom.
Tom giggled quietly before answering back, "I didn't notice, maybe it's the baking soda"
"You son of a bitch Tom! You put salty toothpaste on my toothbrush" Adam yelled
Tom just laughed.
by Nutzen YerMouf June 10, 2017
Get the Salty toothpaste mug.The male in the relationship when a female "virgin" has sexual intercourse with a male but the female does not count it against her virginity.
A girl who had practice wood often wears a purity ring. This is used to make others believe she is still a virgin, and help her to believe it herself.
Ron wanted to be Rebecca's practice wood . He proclaimed himself a Christian and joined the local Young Republican's group. When around her, he would say "Praise Jesus" whenever anything remotely good happened. After 3 days, Ron became Rebecca's practice wood. Ron also discovered he wasn't her first practice wood, even though she was "still a virgin."
When a girl is "Still a virgin" because she wants to wait until she is married before having sex, she will engage in sexual intercourse with a male (the practice wood), but not count it and still proclaim her virginity.
Ron wanted to be Rebecca's practice wood . He proclaimed himself a Christian and joined the local Young Republican's group. When around her, he would say "Praise Jesus" whenever anything remotely good happened. After 3 days, Ron became Rebecca's practice wood. Ron also discovered he wasn't her first practice wood, even though she was "still a virgin."
When a girl is "Still a virgin" because she wants to wait until she is married before having sex, she will engage in sexual intercourse with a male (the practice wood), but not count it and still proclaim her virginity.
by Nutzen YerMouf July 14, 2017
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