Mike Read's definitions

knees up mother brown

national anthem of cockneyland

aind, knees ap muvva brahn, etc

by mike read August 7, 2003

cor blimey

catchphrase of your average cockney wanker

cor blimey arthur, aren't you garring (trans: going) dahn va car lot?

by mike read August 7, 2003

tossing

either something you do to a salad, or another word for wanking. or wanking into a salad.

jamie oliver said "it's been a good night's tossing once again, guvnah."

by mike read August 7, 2003

Cockney Wanker

Someone from London, usually second hand car salesmen, who read the sun newspaper, call all women " dawlin' " (trans: darling) and general ponce about the place like they are something special.

Cor Blimey Guvnah, I'm a cockney wanker, and no mistake!

by Mike Read July 27, 2003

eastender

either a crap soap opera about cockney wanker or the real life place where true cockey waners live

everyone's talking about it- yeah they are saying thank fuck I don't live in the east end like these tossers.

by mike read August 7, 2003

mockney

someone who, bizarely, wishes they were a Cockney when they aren't one. Even more annoying than a cockney wanker since the latter can't help it, but a mockney is so by choice.

That Jamie Oliver is a right mockney wanker

by Mike Read July 27, 2003

Jugs

something for keeping milk in

nice jugs there, Daisy

by mike read August 13, 2003