Definitions by Mike Comanche

Strippertution 

STRIPPERTUTION = STRIPPER + prostiTUTION.

When you hire a stripper to come over to your house and then you jerk off while she dances naked in front of you.

PLAINTIFF: But, your honor, Strippertution isn't prostitution, because we NEVER touched at all.

JUDGE: Good point. Case dismissed.

Strippertution by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009

Laydee

A woman you LAY.

MIKE: So, did you and Bethany get it on last night?

JEFF: Hell yeah! Beth is my Laydee.

Laydee by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009

future ex-wife 

Fiancee.

BOB: Are you and Sheila getting married?

JOHN: Hell yeah, she's my future ex-wife Bro!

future ex-wife by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009

Net Nerd 

Someone who spends all of their time on the internet.

Poindexter is a 40 year old virgin. Why? Cuz he's a Net Nerd!

Net Nerd by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009

STD chain 

People who are connected to each other via the transmission of an STD.

BOB: Jane is such a fox!

JOE: Yeah, the sad part is, we are part of the same STD chain, but, I have never actually fucked her.

BOB: What?

JOE: Jane gave herpes to Kate, that ugly bi chick I fucked last summer when I was waisted, and Kate gave me herpes. So Jane and I are in the same STD chain.

BOB: Oh, I get it! Cool.

STD chain by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009

Bachelor 

Someone who understands the TRUE definition of MARRIAGE (Marriage is the #1 cause of divorce).

BOB: So, do you ever think about getting married?

JOE: Hell no, I can't afford a divorce! Besides Jesus didn't get married, and He said there is no marriage in Heaven, so that's gotta tell you something! I'll be a bachelor FOREVER!

Bachelor by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009

Jew Egg 

Fried or poached egg on a toasted onion bagel.

I'd rather have a Jew egg than an Egg McMuffin!

Jew Egg by Mike Comanche March 4, 2009