19 definitions by Mike in Aurora, Colorado

Night Freak

Is when a person is involuntarily accosted sexually, normally in the form of oral sex, generally referred to when it is the female initiating the act while she is awake and her male target is asleep. Although the scenario thus described is the most common usage, it does have derivatives and alternative sexual encounters that relate to the same. 1.) When an awake female performs oral sex, or fellatio, on a male when he is asleep. 2.) Any sexual situation that is perpetuated by a waking party, or parties, as the sexual target is accosted. 3.) Having an orgasm during a 'night freak' session, whether awake or asleep, when climax occurs. It is often a reciprocal statement of the obvious.

After a female pulls such a stunt on a sleeping male: "Whoa! I couldn't believe that such a church going girl like Linda would pull a 'night freak' on me like that!"

When a guy awakes during a 'night freak' and cums: "Oh, God! I just 'night freaked', baby!"

A gay encounter: "I thought he was just dreamy and he shot out buckets and howled like a wolf when I did a 'night freak' on him! Whadda guy!!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado April 29, 2008

Skiddles

1.) Skid marks (short to long steaks of manure) left at the bottom of a toilet bowl, normally a result of a dry dump' (manure evacuation devoid of proper water or moisture). 2.) Spackling of manure as the result of either diarrhea, extremely propelled pieces of dung, or, simply summer splashing (water and other local substances in a toilet bowl that splash one's buttocks, genitals and under thighs). 3.) Marks are normally as described in 1.) and are usually found within the surface of the toilet bowl, or the underneath rim. However, in certain cases it entails also the underside of a toilet seat, the top of the rim, and, or, the top side behind the toilet seat itself. 4.) A derogatory term used in place of the word dingleberry, or, dingleberries, inclusively.

Illegal Alien Hotel Workers: "Ay, caramba! That Gringo left mucho 'skiddles' in the crapper!!"

Maintenance Order: "Oh, by the way, Tom. When you clean the offices after hours, would you mind getting all those 'skiddles' in the execuive restroom? I appreciate it!" Said mister Ballebusder before leaving for the day.

Housewife Commiseration: "I love my husband with all my heart, but I just wish for once that he'd stop leaving so many damned 'skiddles' in the crapper! It's geee rosssss!"

High School Gossip: "Man! That Joey burned me when I bought grass from him. He's a real 'skiddles'!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 13, 2008

Subway Transfer

1.) Pertains to the penetration of a female's vagina and then the anus by an erect penis on an alternating basis. Normally, it starts with first vaginal penetration, then anal, then vaginal again, and so forth. The duration can vary in length of either orafice, although it is standard to only apply this term to short durations for the same. (about three to ten seconds of actual penetration of either orafice before withdrawal of the penis for the intent of penetrating the adjacent orafice). * Warning: Should only be attempted with either a condom, regular physical check ups, and/or, with a singular partner relationship three to five years in progress.

Sexual Intent: "I wanna do a 'subway transfer' on that chick!"

Hemorrhoids: "I wouldn't have had such a huge 'rhoid if my husband didn't pull a 'subway transfer' on my ass all the time!"

Harmful Notion: "Man! That bitch is going pay for her stuff with a 'subway transfer' by me!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado March 13, 2008

Whoosh

1.) Predominately used in direct conjunction with a sound that is similiar, a 'whooshing' sound, as it were. 2.) A modern day word that follows a long history from origin to the present. Origin: From the word pussy, in direct application as used to describe either a vagina, or vaginas (plural), and/or can be used to describe either a coward or woos (part whimp and part pussy). Progression: In the early 1980's all the way up to now, the word woos was a hybrid of pussy and wimp. Present: Recently, the word whoosh has come into the spotlight. It follows up on all preceding definitons whereas the word dooche has been used to describe someone of low character, low esteem, loser, rip off artist, and any other applicable usages of that word. Hence, the word: Whoosh! 3.) A direct combination of the words: Pussy, * Woos, and dooche. Please note: Woos is already a derivative word.

Literature: He entered the building and the fresh air came in like a 'whoosh'! Needless to say, the fart smell vacated the front lobby expediently.

Sex: "He's such a 'whoosh'! He was quick on the trigger, didn't do any foreplay whatsoever, and he's been boasting 'bout what a stud he is! Sheeeit!"

Bad Drug Deal: "The stuff I tried was great, but the bag he sold me was mostly cut! That nigga Smith is such a 'whoosh'!"

Failed Relationship: "Karen appeared to be Ruth's friend, but after she pulled that number on her, she's nothin' but a big headed 'whoosh'!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado March 20, 2008

Condumb

1.) Description of a person that is either too stupid or too arrogant to wear a condom when performing sex or when about to perform the same. 2.) A really stupid convict or an ex-con, denoted for being extremely idiotic or devoid of common sense.

Sex: "If you think that I am gonna let you stick that thing in without protection, then you are a real 'condumb'! Better get reacquainted with your hand!!"

Gangs: "Boo Boo Bear got popped by the cops for something really stupid. He's a real 'condumb'!"

Prison: "Harry the Hun got parole, but he got into trouble again on the outside, so he's back. Whadda a 'condumb'!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 25, 2008