Representatard (rep re zen tuh tard) NOUN. An extraordinarily stupid member of the U.S. House of Representatives.
Minnesota’s Michelle Bachmann is a prime example of a representatard. Here are a few quotes.
On gay marriage: “This is probably the biggest issue that will impact our state and our nation in the last, at least, 30 years. I am not understating that.” — Michelle Bachmann, on “Prophetic Views Behind The News”, hosted by Jan Markell, KKMS 980-AM, March 20, 2004.
On what will happen if her same-sex marriage ban amendment fails to pass in 2004: “It isn’t that some gay will get some rights. It’s that everyone else in our state will lose rights. For instance, parents will lose the right to protect and direct the upbringing of their children. Because our K-12 public school system, of which 90 percent of all youth are in the public school system, they will be required to learn that homosexuality is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.” -Bachmann, on “Prophetic Views Behind The News”, hosted by Jan Markell, KKMS 980-AM, March 6, 2004.
"They look at this administration, and in the name of economic stimulus, they saw that this current liberal administration has legislation that is overflowing with wasteful government spending. And they might have heard about one of these wasteful projects. It is a brand new, billion-dollar high speed train that is going to go from Disneyland up to Las Vegas. A billion dollars of a widow's money to go to pay for a brand new ride essentially from Disneyland to Las Vegas. Harry Reid, the Senator from Nevada, was behind this measure, and it makes us wonder, is he more interested in making sure kids start gambling at younger ages?"
"Pelosi is committed to her global warming fanaticism to the point where she has said that she's just trying to save the planet. We all know that someone did that over 2,000 years ago, they saved the planet -- we didn't need Nancy Pelosi to do that."
"Many teenagers that come in should be paying the employer because of broken dishes or whatever occurs during that period of time. But you know what? After six months, that teenager is going to be a fabulous employee and is going to go on a trajectory where he's going to be making so much money, we'll be borrowing money from him." —Michelle Bachmann, 1/26/05, explains why teens should pay employers for the privilege of working instead of receiving minimum wage.
"I had high heels on and I just couldn't stand anymore. I was not in the bushes." -Bachman on why she was hiding in the bushes spying on a gay rights rally.
On gay marriage: “This is probably the biggest issue that will impact our state and our nation in the last, at least, 30 years. I am not understating that.” — Michelle Bachmann, on “Prophetic Views Behind The News”, hosted by Jan Markell, KKMS 980-AM, March 20, 2004.
On what will happen if her same-sex marriage ban amendment fails to pass in 2004: “It isn’t that some gay will get some rights. It’s that everyone else in our state will lose rights. For instance, parents will lose the right to protect and direct the upbringing of their children. Because our K-12 public school system, of which 90 percent of all youth are in the public school system, they will be required to learn that homosexuality is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.” -Bachmann, on “Prophetic Views Behind The News”, hosted by Jan Markell, KKMS 980-AM, March 6, 2004.
"They look at this administration, and in the name of economic stimulus, they saw that this current liberal administration has legislation that is overflowing with wasteful government spending. And they might have heard about one of these wasteful projects. It is a brand new, billion-dollar high speed train that is going to go from Disneyland up to Las Vegas. A billion dollars of a widow's money to go to pay for a brand new ride essentially from Disneyland to Las Vegas. Harry Reid, the Senator from Nevada, was behind this measure, and it makes us wonder, is he more interested in making sure kids start gambling at younger ages?"
"Pelosi is committed to her global warming fanaticism to the point where she has said that she's just trying to save the planet. We all know that someone did that over 2,000 years ago, they saved the planet -- we didn't need Nancy Pelosi to do that."
"Many teenagers that come in should be paying the employer because of broken dishes or whatever occurs during that period of time. But you know what? After six months, that teenager is going to be a fabulous employee and is going to go on a trajectory where he's going to be making so much money, we'll be borrowing money from him." —Michelle Bachmann, 1/26/05, explains why teens should pay employers for the privilege of working instead of receiving minimum wage.
"I had high heels on and I just couldn't stand anymore. I was not in the bushes." -Bachman on why she was hiding in the bushes spying on a gay rights rally.
by Maxhole June 22, 2009
When Feinstein was a city supervisor, she got the mayor's job because he was assassinated.
While mayor of San Francisco, her husband owned a fuckton of rental property downtown, and quadrupled his net worth. Her money more than doubled.
Now that she's on the Senate Committees on defense, intelligence and homeland security, her husband's company has all these Iraq and Afghanistan construction projects. She votes with Republicans for war to send more money to her hubby.
She oozed her way into office and nothing sticks to her protective coating of slime.
She's not a Democrat, she's a Phlegmocrat.
While mayor of San Francisco, her husband owned a fuckton of rental property downtown, and quadrupled his net worth. Her money more than doubled.
Now that she's on the Senate Committees on defense, intelligence and homeland security, her husband's company has all these Iraq and Afghanistan construction projects. She votes with Republicans for war to send more money to her hubby.
She oozed her way into office and nothing sticks to her protective coating of slime.
She's not a Democrat, she's a Phlegmocrat.
by Maxhole June 22, 2009
snodgepocker (snodj pock er) NOUN. An annoying but endearing creature. Or is it endearing but annoying? Either way, you want to smack them, but can't because they are too Goddamned cute.
Like the cutest, fluffiest little kitten who keeps climbing up your legs and back with his needle-sharp claws to sit on your shoulder and purr.
Her- "How did he get stuck inside the piano?"
Him- "How? He's a hedgehog, that's what they do, look for dark places to curl up and sleep. And take a crap."
Her- "HE CRAPPED INSIDE MY PIANO!?"
(He pulls him out of the piano).
Him- "Sorry about that. Yeah, in't he a cute little snodgepocker?"
Her- "Ohhh... look at that little nosie!"
Him- "So... should we keep him, or call the Humane Society?"
Her- "He's making little piggy noises! We can't just give him away!"
Him- "So, what do you want to name him?"
Her- "Fluffy. Either Fluffy, or Shithead."
Him- "Welcome to the family, Shithead."
Her- "Can I hold him?"
Him- "Get your own damn hedgehog."
(she stands, staring.)
Him- "Shouldn't you be cleaning the shit out of your piano?"
Her- "I changed my mind about his name. I think he's more of a Fluffy."
Him- "Fluffy it is. Welcome to the family, Fluffy."
Her- "From now on, YOU'RE the one I'm calling Shithead."
Him- "There you go, sweet talkin' me again."
Her- "Just hand over the goddam hedgehog, Shithead."
Him- "OK. Here. Careful."
(He puts the hedgehog in her hands).
Her- "OW! Ow! What the fuck?! I am bleeding! You little fucker!"
Him- "The spines are sharp."
Her- "Ja think!?"
Him- "I told you to be careful."
Her- "He's grunting! What does that mean?"
Him- "It means he's hungry. I'll get him some food."
Her- "Oh, no you're not. I'M getting Fluffy's food. Aren't I , Fluffy? Fluffy says yes."
Him- "I'm coming along."
Her- "No, Fluffy says that Mr. Shithead should stay here to clean Fluffy's crap out of my piano. Doesn't he? Yesss he does."
Him- (grumbling) "Fucking hedgehog always takes her side."
Her- "How did he get stuck inside the piano?"
Him- "How? He's a hedgehog, that's what they do, look for dark places to curl up and sleep. And take a crap."
Her- "HE CRAPPED INSIDE MY PIANO!?"
(He pulls him out of the piano).
Him- "Sorry about that. Yeah, in't he a cute little snodgepocker?"
Her- "Ohhh... look at that little nosie!"
Him- "So... should we keep him, or call the Humane Society?"
Her- "He's making little piggy noises! We can't just give him away!"
Him- "So, what do you want to name him?"
Her- "Fluffy. Either Fluffy, or Shithead."
Him- "Welcome to the family, Shithead."
Her- "Can I hold him?"
Him- "Get your own damn hedgehog."
(she stands, staring.)
Him- "Shouldn't you be cleaning the shit out of your piano?"
Her- "I changed my mind about his name. I think he's more of a Fluffy."
Him- "Fluffy it is. Welcome to the family, Fluffy."
Her- "From now on, YOU'RE the one I'm calling Shithead."
Him- "There you go, sweet talkin' me again."
Her- "Just hand over the goddam hedgehog, Shithead."
Him- "OK. Here. Careful."
(He puts the hedgehog in her hands).
Her- "OW! Ow! What the fuck?! I am bleeding! You little fucker!"
Him- "The spines are sharp."
Her- "Ja think!?"
Him- "I told you to be careful."
Her- "He's grunting! What does that mean?"
Him- "It means he's hungry. I'll get him some food."
Her- "Oh, no you're not. I'M getting Fluffy's food. Aren't I , Fluffy? Fluffy says yes."
Him- "I'm coming along."
Her- "No, Fluffy says that Mr. Shithead should stay here to clean Fluffy's crap out of my piano. Doesn't he? Yesss he does."
Him- (grumbling) "Fucking hedgehog always takes her side."
by Maxhole June 23, 2009
Randy- Damn, that girl gots more curves than Indy 500.
Ron- She's a great fuck, too.
Randy- How would you know?
Ron- I dated her. That's Lisa.
Randy- Damn. I'd like to bite her on the ass and be dragged to death. Why'd you ever break up with a woman that hot?
Ron- I musta lost my mind. Sweetest lady I ever knew. She is spumptious.
Randy- Think she'd go out with me?
Ron- Not a chance.
Randy- Why?
Ron- 'Cuz you're a friend of mine.
Randy- Not anymore we're not, you asshole! Hey! Lisa! Wait up!
Ron- She's a great fuck, too.
Randy- How would you know?
Ron- I dated her. That's Lisa.
Randy- Damn. I'd like to bite her on the ass and be dragged to death. Why'd you ever break up with a woman that hot?
Ron- I musta lost my mind. Sweetest lady I ever knew. She is spumptious.
Randy- Think she'd go out with me?
Ron- Not a chance.
Randy- Why?
Ron- 'Cuz you're a friend of mine.
Randy- Not anymore we're not, you asshole! Hey! Lisa! Wait up!
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
hicktatorship (hik tay ter ship) NOUN.
1. A dictatorship run by country bumpkins and rural dolts.
2. The George W. Bush Presidency.
3. Miserable failure.
1. A dictatorship run by country bumpkins and rural dolts.
2. The George W. Bush Presidency.
3. Miserable failure.
When that gang of arrogant yahoos took over the White House and trashed the Constitution, they turned the U.S. into a hicktatorship.
by Maxhole June 25, 2009
inheritocracy (in hair it ok ra see) NOUN. A political system in which the power is inherited, along with large sums of money and property.
Ever notice how the same few families have always been in charge of everything, worldwide? And how they're all related to each other in some big incestuous clusterfuck? That's an inheritocracy. They get so inbred, we wind up with sadistic war criminals like George Bush. That's the bad news. The good news is, we still have guillotines.
by Maxhole June 21, 2009
by Maxhole June 22, 2009