Len Bakerloo's definitions
/fək kahrd/
Noun.
1. A calling card for anyone whose business primarily involves fucking others, e.g. prostitutes, politicians, lawyers, etc.
2. A card from any card game designed to fuck with your head or empty your wallet.
Noun.
1. A calling card for anyone whose business primarily involves fucking others, e.g. prostitutes, politicians, lawyers, etc.
2. A card from any card game designed to fuck with your head or empty your wallet.
That game might have 15% black cards and 85% white cards but they are 100% fuckcards. I'd tell you the name of the game but the fucktards that run the company had their dipshit lawyers send me a C&D letter so I can't. If you need the name of the lawyer I'm sure I have her fuckcard around here somewhere.
by Len Bakerloo January 19, 2019
Get the fuckcardmug. Nomic is an initially boring finite game created in 1982 by the philosopher Peter Suber.
On your turn you roll a die and add its value to your score. The first person to reach 100 wins and the game ends. However, each player can also propose a new rule or a modification of an old one on their turn and if the rule is adopted then the game can morph into something else.
On your turn you roll a die and add its value to your score. The first person to reach 100 wins and the game ends. However, each player can also propose a new rule or a modification of an old one on their turn and if the rule is adopted then the game can morph into something else.
Bob: "Let's play Nomic."
Carol: "Great. I propose the first rule is that we change the name to NotNomic and replace the number 100 in the win state with Infinity. That way we have an infinite game we can enjoy playing forever."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Ted: "The ayes have it. The rule is adopted. I propose we change the name to NullNomic and change the number in the win state to zero so the game is over before it starts and we don't have to play at all."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Alice: "The Ayes have it. Boy am I glad that shenanigans is over. Anyone up for a beer?"
Carol: "Great. I propose the first rule is that we change the name to NotNomic and replace the number 100 in the win state with Infinity. That way we have an infinite game we can enjoy playing forever."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Ted: "The ayes have it. The rule is adopted. I propose we change the name to NullNomic and change the number in the win state to zero so the game is over before it starts and we don't have to play at all."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Alice: "The Ayes have it. Boy am I glad that shenanigans is over. Anyone up for a beer?"
by Len Bakerloo June 9, 2019
Get the Nomicmug. The process of getting between you and an intermediary in the name of getting intermediaries out of the way. Recruiters intermediate by getting in between of employers and job seekers for a fee. Disintermediation of the job market would get the recruiters out of the picture. Interdisintermediation is getting between you and a recruiter in the name of getting recruiters out of the picture.
In theory LinkedIn should help me find my next job directly but nothing happened until I paid them a fee. Then I got flooded with spam from recruiters. Great job at interdisintermediation.
by Len Bakerloo December 13, 2020
Get the interdisintermediationmug. Two single word (or 64 binary digits) capable of expressing numbers as large as 1.7 E 308, which is 1 E 206 times the number of atoms in the known universe. (1.7 E 308 means 1.7 times 10 raised to the 308th power.)
Why did the system crash? After we got sued for coding gender as binary we decided to use double word floats instead. That worked in beta test in New York but when we brought California on-line the whole thing crashed.
by Len Bakerloo June 17, 2018
Get the Double Word Floatmug. The act of putting a silent “p” in front of a word so that one can create a new word that is pronounced exactly the same way so as to distinguish it from all other instances of the same word. A psmithsized word can mean exactly the same thing, something completely different or anything in between.
The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.
Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.
The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.
Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.
Bob: Honey, now that we've both read Cat's Cradle you'll have to admit that we form a duprass. We're clearly a karass of two people with a bond so strong that even our children cannot invade our union.
Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.
Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?
Carol: Deal.
Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.
Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?
Carol: Deal.
by Len Bakerloo June 26, 2019
Get the psmithisizemug. A federal agency established after 9/11/2001 to carry on the work of the terrorists. They help us fear nature by taking over FEMA and diverting funds that would have been spent on hurricane relief to equip meter maids with assault rifles. Constant reminders to "report suspicious behavior" to the police have made us fear each other and criminalized social anxiety disorder. Thanks to their fine efforts, being too shy to ask a girl for sex is now as likely to get you investigated as asking a girl for sex.
by Len Bakerloo June 16, 2018
Get the Homeland Securitymug. An extremely politically correct variant of "person" introduced as an alternative to the use of "perdaughter" to appease women and because "person and/or perdaughter and/or other" is both cumbersome and offensive to the non-binary.
Person A: Honey, the postman just delivered the mail.
Perchild B: Two years ago we were told that the proper term is "postperson" because it was determined that the "postman" is offensive to women. Last year regulators realized that "person" is offencive to daughters so now must use "postperchild" otherwise we won't get any mail.
Person A: May I refer to him as Fred.
Perchild B: No. That is offensive to all people not named Fred.
Person A: But his name is Fred.
Perchild B: That's irrelevant. And, if you ever call me "honey" again I'm going to divorce you.
Perchild B: Two years ago we were told that the proper term is "postperson" because it was determined that the "postman" is offensive to women. Last year regulators realized that "person" is offencive to daughters so now must use "postperchild" otherwise we won't get any mail.
Person A: May I refer to him as Fred.
Perchild B: No. That is offensive to all people not named Fred.
Person A: But his name is Fred.
Perchild B: That's irrelevant. And, if you ever call me "honey" again I'm going to divorce you.
by Len Bakerloo January 8, 2019
Get the perchildmug.