Len Bakerloo's definitions
/fək kahrd/
Noun.
1. A calling card for anyone whose business primarily involves fucking others, e.g. prostitutes, politicians, lawyers, etc.
2. A card from any card game designed to fuck with your head or empty your wallet.
Noun.
1. A calling card for anyone whose business primarily involves fucking others, e.g. prostitutes, politicians, lawyers, etc.
2. A card from any card game designed to fuck with your head or empty your wallet.
That game might have 15% black cards and 85% white cards but they are 100% fuckcards. I'd tell you the name of the game but the fucktards that run the company had their dipshit lawyers send me a C&D letter so I can't. If you need the name of the lawyer I'm sure I have her fuckcard around here somewhere.
by Len Bakerloo January 19, 2019
Get the fuckcard mug.Nomic is an initially boring finite game created in 1982 by the philosopher Peter Suber.
On your turn you roll a die and add its value to your score. The first person to reach 100 wins and the game ends. However, each player can also propose a new rule or a modification of an old one on their turn and if the rule is adopted then the game can morph into something else.
On your turn you roll a die and add its value to your score. The first person to reach 100 wins and the game ends. However, each player can also propose a new rule or a modification of an old one on their turn and if the rule is adopted then the game can morph into something else.
Bob: "Let's play Nomic."
Carol: "Great. I propose the first rule is that we change the name to NotNomic and replace the number 100 in the win state with Infinity. That way we have an infinite game we can enjoy playing forever."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Ted: "The ayes have it. The rule is adopted. I propose we change the name to NullNomic and change the number in the win state to zero so the game is over before it starts and we don't have to play at all."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Alice: "The Ayes have it. Boy am I glad that shenanigans is over. Anyone up for a beer?"
Carol: "Great. I propose the first rule is that we change the name to NotNomic and replace the number 100 in the win state with Infinity. That way we have an infinite game we can enjoy playing forever."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Ted: "The ayes have it. The rule is adopted. I propose we change the name to NullNomic and change the number in the win state to zero so the game is over before it starts and we don't have to play at all."
Bob, Carol, Ted, Alice: "Aye."
Alice: "The Ayes have it. Boy am I glad that shenanigans is over. Anyone up for a beer?"
by Len Bakerloo June 9, 2019
Get the Nomic mug.A process of making something stupid because that is what Google says it is.
For Example: If you put “Reductio ad Absurdum” into Google Translate it detects the language as Latin, and translates it to English as: “Reductio ad Absurdum.”
Another Example: For years (through May 29, 2018 at least) if you ask Google "What does it mean to be an American?" it responds with this as the first answer (in a box even):
"It means that I can say "The Pledge of Allegiance" and that I can vote for the President, my county clerk, and the Mayor. But to me it means most of all to be free and to be proud that I live in the United States of America here in Wisconsin."
Dig deeper and you'll find it is written by an 10-year-old who, in addition to thinking that the U. S. is in Wisconsin, does not know that to be an American means she is free to NOT say the pledge and that she has 10 years to go before she can vote.
Thank you Google for establishing a 10-year-old as the #1 expert on what it means to be a patriot. Way to go.
For Example: If you put “Reductio ad Absurdum” into Google Translate it detects the language as Latin, and translates it to English as: “Reductio ad Absurdum.”
Another Example: For years (through May 29, 2018 at least) if you ask Google "What does it mean to be an American?" it responds with this as the first answer (in a box even):
"It means that I can say "The Pledge of Allegiance" and that I can vote for the President, my county clerk, and the Mayor. But to me it means most of all to be free and to be proud that I live in the United States of America here in Wisconsin."
Dig deeper and you'll find it is written by an 10-year-old who, in addition to thinking that the U. S. is in Wisconsin, does not know that to be an American means she is free to NOT say the pledge and that she has 10 years to go before she can vote.
Thank you Google for establishing a 10-year-old as the #1 expert on what it means to be a patriot. Way to go.
If we're going to Make America Great Again we've got to stop all this Reductio ad Absurdum going on.
by Len Bakerloo June 11, 2018
Get the Reductio ad Absurdum mug.The act of putting a silent “p” in front of a word so that one can create a new word that is pronounced exactly the same way so as to distinguish it from all other instances of the same word. A psmithsized word can mean exactly the same thing, something completely different or anything in between.
The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.
Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.
The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.
Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.
Bob: Honey, now that we've both read Cat's Cradle you'll have to admit that we form a duprass. We're clearly a karass of two people with a bond so strong that even our children cannot invade our union.
Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.
Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?
Carol: Deal.
Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.
Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?
Carol: Deal.
by Len Bakerloo June 26, 2019
Get the psmithisize mug.A federal agency established after 9/11/2001 to carry on the work of the terrorists. They help us fear nature by taking over FEMA and diverting funds that would have been spent on hurricane relief to equip meter maids with assault rifles. Constant reminders to "report suspicious behavior" to the police have made us fear each other and criminalized social anxiety disorder. Thanks to their fine efforts, being too shy to ask a girl for sex is now as likely to get you investigated as asking a girl for sex.
by Len Bakerloo June 16, 2018
Get the Homeland Security mug.The repeated patching up of a flimsy argument for a ridiculous proposition made by someone you’d think would be smarter.
Reductape is Latin for the process of repeatedly patching something until all you see is the patch and you can no longer see the thing being patched.
Absurdium is an isotope of Einsteinium (Es, atomic number 99) which when present in the brain of even the hugest genius renders them stupid.
Reductape is Latin for the process of repeatedly patching something until all you see is the patch and you can no longer see the thing being patched.
Absurdium is an isotope of Einsteinium (Es, atomic number 99) which when present in the brain of even the hugest genius renders them stupid.
Did you hear Trump’s latest claims that the election was rigged?
Yes. It was a case of reductape add absurdium.
Yes. It was a case of reductape add absurdium.
by Len Bakerloo December 5, 2020
Get the reductape add absurdium mug.When you cc all your friends on an email asking a simple question in the subject line and it sets off a mass of useless comments and comments on comments ad infinitum of no use in answering the question.
I asked Google "What does it mean to be an American" and Google's number one answer was an essay by a 10-year-old who doesn't know anything about citizenship and perhaps couldn't find the USA is on the globe, all because somebody who ran a contest for kids hired an SEO expert. So I sent an email to all my friends "How do we get Google to do its fucking job?" and that set off a chit-chat-storm, but nobody had a fucking idea of how to get Google to do its fucking job.
by Len Bakerloo December 7, 2019
Get the chit-chat-storm mug.