11 definitions by Lee Farmie

A prolonged conversation of no meaning undertaken exclusively by males under the influence of large quantities of alcohol. Nothing of any value is established through such intercourse the purpose of which is purely for the entertainment of those so engaged. Although utterly hilarious to those participating in a floating cheese conversation such talk invariably leaves sober bystanders and all females wholly perplexed.

The term comes from one such meaningless conversation in which the relative bouyancy of cheese was hotly debated for many hours.
The six old friends enjoyed an evening of strong ale and floating cheese.
by Lee Farmie October 6, 2004
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A stool rendered unflushable by its sheer enormity. Named after fomer British heavyweight boxer, Frank Bruno.
Angela quickly moved on to the next lavatory having been horrified by the sight of bruno's arm in the first.
by Lee Farmie October 15, 2004
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An official of any small amateur or semi-professional football (soccer) club in the UK. They are often, but not exclusively, elderly, haughty and completely out of touch with the club's supporters.

They drink free tea and cakes before, at half-time and after the game, they NEVER pay to watch the game and always receive a free programme or matchday magazine. They almost invariably wear a white shirt, a club tie and, of course, a blazer: a dark jacket often bearing the club's crest on the breast pocket.

They tend to be held in low esteem by supporters and "blazer" should be considered a derogatory term.
As Vice Chairman, Clive felt he was an important and respected figure at the club. The fans just sniggered at the pompous old blazer.
by Lee Farmie October 15, 2004
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A head butt. Where one person violently smashes his or her forehead into the face of another normally resulting the latter's discomfort and/or severe facial injury.
Peeved by Rupert's impertinence, Neville gave him a glaswegian kiss and put him hospital.
by Lee Farmie October 15, 2004
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A particularly offensive fart; one that tends to clear a room for anything up to half an hour.
The business meeting was suspended for several minutes after Timothy involuntarily dropped a Grasmere Thunderbolt.
by Lee Farmie October 15, 2004
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A cheap snack bar or cafeteria serving inexpensive cholesterol-heavy food to the working classes.

A full English fry up, sickly ketchup, astringent malt vinegar and a mug of boiling hot tea all sitting on a cracked formica table. Bloody marvellous!
The Rendezvous on the A22 at Wapses Lodge, between Whyteleafe and Caterham.
by Lee Farmie October 15, 2004
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Someone who, during the course of a conversation or debate, becomes increasingly agitated and ends up ranting and raving.

The best way of tipping such a person over the edge is to start chanting "mad dog, mad dog, mad dog", in unison, quietly at first but growing in volume while tapping your nails on the table top. This will guarantee an hilarious end to the conversation.
Derek, a notorious mad dog screamed: "LOOK, YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT!....".
by Lee Farmie October 15, 2004
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