Lazarus Ciccone's definitions

FOX

American television network. The face of evil in modern media. Introduced the world to trash TV two decades ago with such pointless crap as "The Morton Downey Jr. Show" and have continued the trend with such recent entries as "Who's Your Daddy?" and "The Swan."

Despite this, news division and all-news cable channel are so rabidly pro right-wing you almost expect nazi propaganda films to play after midnight. Often decries "immoral" activities and supports war on the grounds of "fighting the forces of evil."

"Fox sucks. The only thing I watch on it is football."

"Maybe Rupert Murdoch is the anti-Christ"

by Lazarus Ciccone January 10, 2005

Leaf fan

A clueless lemming who compares their favourite team, hockey's Toronto Maple Leafs to baseball's New York Yankees in terms of tradition and excellence. One major discrepancy however, is the fact the Yankees have won something in the past four decades.

The average Leaf fan is a middle-aged white person who keeps showing up ready to hand over their money year after year despite notoriously cheap ownership. Regardless, their annual optism about getting "The Cup" is a fascinating study in blind stupidity.

"We're awesome despite 38 years of championship-free hockey! Go Leafs Go!"

by Lazarus Ciccone December 22, 2004

white trash

Basically, most of the caucasian population of Michigan.

"Let's move to Michigan. We can pretend we're Kid Rock or Eminem, let 19 year olds father children with 11 year olds, and be white trash."

by Lazarus Ciccone August 1, 2007

Facebook

A semi-useful social networking site that's a decent way of reaching certain people and tracking down acquaintances you don't talk to very often. Also valuable if you enjoy reading people's status updates, such as important breaking news like "Arthur is at home" and "Serena can't wait for the weekend."

Jimmy is having marginal success with using Facebook to fuck chicks

I'm still getting friend requests from high school acquaintances on Facebook. That site is so 2007.

by Lazarus Ciccone August 20, 2008

TSN

Canadian 24-hour sports channel which debuted in 1984. Percentage of it was purchased by ESPN in 1995 after the Canadian government, in their protectionist infinite wisdom, revoked the American network's entry into the Canadian TV market. (After all, everyone knows the biggest cultural threat to Canada is the NCAA). Gradually since, all graphics, logos and names have been styled in the ESPN format - i.e. "Sportscentre" with Canadian spelling. The essential result is a network which devotes 90% of its time to hockey and curling while using exciting teases and graphics. Only notable upside is simulcasting of some ESPN programming.

I could tell you some salacious stories about what has gone on behind the scenes at TSN in recent years, but I won't.

by Lazarus Ciccone January 13, 2006

quiver

A physical, shaking motion, often exhibited while achieving climax during sexual activity.

"Right before you come, let me know so I can shove this shampoo bottle up your ass. You'll quiver"

by Lazarus Ciccone April 22, 2004

Karl Rove

Political mastermind and advisor to President George W. Bush. Acts as Bush's brain, in part because Bush's is microscopic. Can also be likened to "scum of the earth" and "lowest form of humanity". Generally speaking, feces have more ethics and character.

"Karl Rove is a parasite. Anyone who leaks the name of a covert CIA agent as retribution for exposing his own lie is guilty of treason. Therefore, any American who believes this piece of crap actually cares about his country is far too stupid to be alive."

by Lazarus Ciccone September 30, 2005