Definitions by Lajopi 292

Mod Plod 

Ministry of Defence Police officer

Do you remember the Mod Plod beating those peace protestors at Greenham Common? Good work fellas...

Mod Plod by lajopi 292 August 13, 2007

submariner 

Steely eyed stern jawed salt encrusted killers from the deep, prowling seas in their sleek black messanger of death

Royal Navy Submariners eat their young, oh yeah, watch out skimmers...

submariner by lajopi 292 August 11, 2007

Dive Master 

By day a polite and responsible respectable dive instructor, usually found somewhere in a tropical climate teaching tourists to dive in a safe and responsible manner, by night a drunk womanising chain smoking inhabitant of any given beach bar, destined for kidney dialysis in later life. Cayman Island divemasters are reputed to be the most outlandish

"did you see that guy fighting and vomiting at the same time in the bar last night? I think he was a Dive Master"

Dive Master by lajopi 292 August 11, 2007

Sun Dodger 

A Submariner in any of the world's Navies

"you were in the navy for ten years,you must have seen loads of places"

"Nah, I was a sun dodger"

Sun Dodger by lajopi 292 August 10, 2007

crack spastic 

An insult used by police officers from one station in central London, to describe a person who is completely obnoxious, irritating, incompetent or just plain stupid to such a degree it's funny, can be a member of the public or a colleague, usually a senior officer. Its use is mainly limited to one police station, but is starting to spread

"did you hear that bloke I nicked, saying he was going to get me sacked 'cos his uncle's a barrister?"

"yeah, what an utter fuckin crack spastic!"

crack spastic by lajopi 292 August 10, 2007

DWB 

Something that plastic wannabe (but not gonnabe) Gangstas in the UK always shout when they get pulled over by the police, because they watch too much TV and think they're homies in South Central LA, rather than a quiet suburb of London. Frequently used by white upper middle class students just prior to being arrested for drink driving. Maybe a respectable saying used legitimately in the USA, but in Europe, it's just gay.

"Here we go again you Po-Po mofo, what's wrong offic-ah, you 'tink u got me for DWB?"

"Sorry sir, why are you speaking with an American accent when you're a student from Oxford.....who's drugs are these in the ashtray?"

DWB by lajopi 292 August 10, 2007

Wren 

Something sailors in the Royal Navy have sex with, if they're too lazy to wank

I woke up with a Wren this morning, she looked like meatloaf. Ug.

Wren by lajopi 292 August 10, 2007