KuNg-fu jeSUS's definitions

arsehole raped

(v.) (Brit, Aust'l'an, Eire) To be completely thrashed.

I was arsehole raped in that game of snooker.

by Kung-Fu Jesus April 30, 2004

smokes three packs a day

One who smokes sicty cigarettes per day.

Your pop caught you smoking, and he said, "No way!"
That hypocrite smokes three packs a day

by Kung-Fu Jesus May 2, 2004

thankyoutony

www.thankyoutony.com

A website made by americans desperate to prove there is strong support for Iraq by sucking cock of the vertically challenged british prime minister, tony b liar. The creators and designers of this site have made sure the opening page makes no sense "Whereas, the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Tony Blair, has vigorously supported the United States in the disarmament of Iraq;" Is the opening sentence, followed by more illiterate drivel and sycophancy. the fuckwits who made it up are also unaware of the general dis-satisfaction of the british population over the situation.

Fuck you Tony Blair, you 5'5" stupid cocksucking socialist politically correct, moronic, anti-british, pro-american, bush loving poodle. See dumbdumbhorsenose

by Kung-Fu Jesus May 29, 2004

go play in the road

An expression of anger towards a person or persons, indicating you would like them to leave.

Take your toys and go play in the road, idiot.

by Kung-fu Jesus July 30, 2004

electrical interweb

The internet

You are using the electrical interweb

by Kung-Fu Jesus April 30, 2004

peasant

A serf with the freedom of choice to work or die of starvation.

The peasantry has been replaced by the working classes and shit welfare systems.

by kung-fu jesus September 18, 2004

zulu

A huge tribe of 30,000 warriors who inhabited Zululand, which is in present day South Africa. The British army decided to conquer zululand, and setup small garrisons of troops to scout it. These were massacred by the Zulu's, and so enraged, the Mighty British Empire rained its' fury on the tribesmen. For several weeks the Zulu tribes laid low, hoping to evade detection. But some 1,200 British Troops and 300 tag-alongs (peaceful natives, soldiers wives etc.) were cut off by water and decided to camp in territory the zulu's were watching. Overnight, the Zulu's gathered and sent 7,000 soldiers onto the camp, killing all but a handful of tag-alongs who escaped when they heard screaming. The Zulu took thier guns and marched on Rorke's Drift, a small military hosital. Rorke's drift was manned by 97 ready soldiers, housed 36 wounded, 14 helpful natives five officers and two lieutenants, one of which was new to the area. They recieved news of the impending Zulu attack, but the new liuetenant demanded that they stay to defend the hospital and chapel. A passing preacher intimidated the natives to throw down thier guns and leave, because of the extreme odds. With Just 141 soldiers (One of the tag-alongs rushed to help them) they took on 4,500 Zulu warriors, 1,200 of which were armed and killed 2,500 Zulus. In comparison, 15 British died on the day, and 8 later died of battle wounds before the Zulu's saluted fellow braves and left. Rorke's Drift signalled the unparalled training of the British amry, but also that the Zulu army, which had impressive capabilities, wouldn't even last until 1880 (Rorke's drift was 22nd-23rd January 1879). Eventually, the Zulu army had to surrender, and became the exploit of the rich. Zulu tribesmen still inhabit South Africa's east coast and centre, but are no longer the dominating force.

The British have much to thank the Zulu for. What was the most impossible military victory ever occured against the zulu, and allowed the victors to return home instilling a strong sense of national pride.

by Kung-Fu Jesus April 30, 2004