1) Someone whose ribcage you'd like to tear open with the claw end of a hammer so you can defecate in his chest cavity.
2) Somebody who should have his head nailed to the floor while being sodomized with a cheesecloth-sack full of a thousand angry bees.
2) Somebody who should have his head nailed to the floor while being sodomized with a cheesecloth-sack full of a thousand angry bees.
Zeke: My request for a new chair was rejected because of that sick twisted disturbed fuck. I tell ya, someone ought to force him at gunpoint to face-fuck a wild boar.
by Krakky McKraken November 05, 2006
Interjection of choice of the Ding. On a bad day fully 75% of what she has to say will consist of "um."
by Krakky McKraken November 05, 2006
by Krakky McKraken August 20, 2006
Short for synapse lapse. In a phone call or voice-mail from the Ding, the lapse in time between "Hello" and the point at which the actual message begins. A synlapse is signalled by a drawn-out um.
The length of a synlapse depends on the complexity of the message, which determines how long it will take the Ding's electron-size brain to fit the information together coherently enough to convey it.
The average length of a synlapse is 45 seconds, during which boredom-induced drooling may commence in the unfortunate recipient of the voice-mail.
The length of a synlapse depends on the complexity of the message, which determines how long it will take the Ding's electron-size brain to fit the information together coherently enough to convey it.
The average length of a synlapse is 45 seconds, during which boredom-induced drooling may commence in the unfortunate recipient of the voice-mail.
The message the Ding left for Zeke lasted two and a half minutes, two minutes of which consisted of a particularly mind-numbing synlapse.
by Krakky McKraken November 23, 2006
A poem, spoken by hillbillies, that *sounds* something like haiku but doesn't scan like it. A hillbilly haiku doesn't fit the 5-7-5 syllable scheme, or even have three lines, because hillbillies can't count.
by Krakky McKraken October 09, 2005
1. (verb) The act of stumbling over an invisible bump in the floor.
2. (noun) The sound one makes when skumping. Usually sounds like a simian grunt.
3. (proper verb) A highly exaggerated form of stumbling performed by a Scape (or Skape). *Perform* is the operative word here. An ordinary scump is more than a regular trip or bump anyway. When done by a Scape, Scumping (note the capitalization) involves wild gestures, blood-curdling shrieks of terror and pain. It is always followed by imaginary injuries and paranoid accusations.
While a normal scump could be the result of tripping over a previously-unseen bump, a Scump is always done for attention and never involves any physical contact, except whatever the Scape ends up falling into (a barrel, a shelf, a table, etc). A Scump has no discernible cause, though the Scape usually tries to blame them on a roadblock of some sort which was purposely left in its way. If ignored, a Scump will be forgotten, though it might resurface in future tales.
Usual suspect causes of a Scump include tables, barrels on the other side of the room, cracks in the floor, and errant dust particles.
2. (noun) The sound one makes when skumping. Usually sounds like a simian grunt.
3. (proper verb) A highly exaggerated form of stumbling performed by a Scape (or Skape). *Perform* is the operative word here. An ordinary scump is more than a regular trip or bump anyway. When done by a Scape, Scumping (note the capitalization) involves wild gestures, blood-curdling shrieks of terror and pain. It is always followed by imaginary injuries and paranoid accusations.
While a normal scump could be the result of tripping over a previously-unseen bump, a Scump is always done for attention and never involves any physical contact, except whatever the Scape ends up falling into (a barrel, a shelf, a table, etc). A Scump has no discernible cause, though the Scape usually tries to blame them on a roadblock of some sort which was purposely left in its way. If ignored, a Scump will be forgotten, though it might resurface in future tales.
Usual suspect causes of a Scump include tables, barrels on the other side of the room, cracks in the floor, and errant dust particles.
1. "Hey, Zeke, what happened?"
"I was headed to the conference room, and suddenly I tripped on a scump."
2. (Walking across the hall)
"Hey, Clem! How're you - ooffff! Scump!"
3. "Someone must have put that table in my way on purpose, because I never saw it before and I fell and..."
"Oh, great. The Scape just Scumped again."
"I was headed to the conference room, and suddenly I tripped on a scump."
2. (Walking across the hall)
"Hey, Clem! How're you - ooffff! Scump!"
3. "Someone must have put that table in my way on purpose, because I never saw it before and I fell and..."
"Oh, great. The Scape just Scumped again."
by Krakky McKraken September 03, 2006
by Krakky McKraken October 02, 2005