Ancient Ass-cheese Flower

Yet another type of grotesque hors d'oeuvres typically served during weddings and other functions at a banquet hall. Just what the hell makes these things up is anyone's guess, but in general, it's a fluffy pastry-like hors d'oeuvre that is stuffed with cheese that tastes like it fermented in someone's ass for a few weeks before being served. Typically only eaten by people who were denied a meal for three hours by an absurdly long wedding ceremony and then had to wait for a few hours for pictures to be taken, this is a stomach-ache in the making for all but the most iron-gutted people. Too messy to be used as an Assembly-safe Shuriken, these pieces of crap are best used as skipping stones if the banquet facility features a nearby body of water.
"Spinach Vomit-bombs and Ancient Ass-cheese Flowers...glad to see Bob and Sue sprang for only the highest-quality food for their reception."
by JustAnotherGuy March 15, 2010
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Spinach Vomit-bomb

A type of hors d'oeuvres that either comes in a frozen package in the supermarket or is made at a banquet facility for weddings or similar functions. Quite often, the banquet facility gets these nasty little shits from those same supermarket frozen packages. The Spinach Vomit-bomb is a wretched piece of flimsy dough packed with the nastiest, most dried out spinach that tastes more like something you might scrape out of your pool when you reopen it. Typically used more as ammunition (see Assembly-safe Shuriken), these pieces of unforgivably disgusting shit can usually be found in piles on serving trays by the time cocktail hour expires.
Jim: "God, I was almost hungry enough to eat a few of those Spinach Vomit-bombs they were serving."

Jack: "Glad you didn't, now we have more ammo to pelt Aunt Rose and Uncle Dave with."
by JustAnotherGuy March 15, 2010
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Rhode Island Traffic Report

Something so fucking predictable they could just record it and play the same tape over and over every day. It's always exactly the same, and ignores anything not within a 2-mile radius of the center of Providence.
"95 North is slow between Thurber's Avenue and the State Offices Exit, 195-westbound is backed up from Broadway to the I-95 split, 95 South is slow from Atwells Avenue to the 146-merge, 146 South you're on your brakes from Admiral Street to the 95 merge, and the 6-10 Connector is backed up to Dean Street...I'm Jim Stearns with your Wheelock Auto Rhode Island Traffic Report."
by JustAnotherGuy March 08, 2010
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Thanksgiving

An ironic holiday where millions of people who claim there is no God take time out of their lives to give thanks to some as-yet undefined scientific principle. Only in America do people celebrate a math problem with a holiday, wherein they call all their religious friends stupid while thanking an exploded fart for creating the universe. Still millions more lament the fact that everything they have in life came at the expense of another human being (the native Americans), despite the fact that every society in the history of mankind has been the same.

A holiday where a select few celebrate by being thankful for what they have, rather than reveling in a self-induced guilt trip over what others don't have.
"Thanksgiving, that wonderful holiday that should really be called I Fucking Earned This Day by most of the people who 'celebrate' it."
by JustAnotherGuy August 19, 2012
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Atheist

An atheist is a person who does not believe in the existence of *ANY* god(s). This term is consistently misused in modern society.

- Refusing to worship God doesn't make one an atheist. If one says things like "well God lets this stuff happen, so I don't believe in him...," it demonstrates that one does believe in God, they just choose not to follow him.

- Many self-proclaimed "atheists" actually hate God. Since it is illogical to hate something you profess does not exist, people who hate God cannot by definition be atheists. If your attitude is "well God lets this happen, so screw Him..." then you're not an atheist.

- People who "don't believe in Jesus" aren't atheists, they're just not Christians. Jews don't believe in Jesus either, that doesn't make them atheists.

- People who say "I'll find out when I get there" aren't atheists, they're agnostics.

- People who join a "National Organization of Atheists" are not atheists; if you don't believe something exists, you don't make a society dedicated to not believing it exists. That's nonsense.
There are very few true atheists in the world. Most "atheists" are actually just people with an axe to grind with God.
by JustAnotherGuy February 12, 2013
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S.H.I.T.

An acronym that stands for "Sexual Harassment Investigation Team." Because as we all know, 99% of "sexual harassment" claims these days are, in fact, a crock of shit.
Suzy filed a sexual harassment claim against Bob because he said she looked hot in her new outfit. Sounds like a S.H.I.T. case if you ask me.
by JustAnotherGuy December 28, 2004
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