John Wesley's definitions
Diet so severe and lacking in nutrition, the person on it either has the goal of looking like a crack whore or trying to get back down to their birth weight. Composed of "nibbling" instead of eating, even buffet plates of food look like appetizers. Food items such as tacos and burritos are comprised of a few small pieces of rinsed turkey meat and a single sliver of cheese (if they splurge). The avid dieter even orders small waters to go with their salads to avoid the calories ice contains.
Customer: "i'll have the 3 inch turkey club sandwich with the turkey meat dragged across the bread, a pickle with no juice and a small water."
Subway: "you must be on the crack ho skinny diet."
Dieter: "I like to put lemon juice on my baked potatoe as a butter substitute, tastes just like it"
Observer: "you dumb bitch, lemon makes anything taste like LEMON!"
Subway: "you must be on the crack ho skinny diet."
Dieter: "I like to put lemon juice on my baked potatoe as a butter substitute, tastes just like it"
Observer: "you dumb bitch, lemon makes anything taste like LEMON!"
by John Wesley February 12, 2008

A person who after years of no contact shows up or gets dropped off (usually after a divorce, but may just be sniffing around) on your door step because their miserable attempt at life has failed and they would like to hang around your family for a little while. Instead of making a good pet, they usually just eat all your food and shit on your carpet.
by John Wesley February 11, 2008

The untanned area directly under a girls ass cheeks that resemble cat eyes when bent over. Resulting from neither the suns nor the tanning beds ability to shine there.
by John Wesley February 11, 2008

Someone who has had so much plastic surgery and/or botox, their lips no longer move and they must speak only using the motion provided by their lower jaw.
We saw this hot looking woman, but she had so much face surgery she looked like a muppet when she spoke.
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

Ambulance driver. Usually characterized by their NREMT patch and window decal. Can also be spotted easily "off duty" (wal-mart, sonic, dollar general) wearing parts of their on-duty clothes and overtly apparent pager.
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

The latent energy frustration built up by your mouse by looking at porn in much the same way it gets built up in you.
by John Wesley February 9, 2008

The guy in the hot tub that can't quite commit to sitting all the way down in the water so they just kind of wade in, and stand there resembling a meerkat.
I was on my way to the hot tub at the gym when I spotted the Hot Tub Meerkat and decided thats too fucking weird, i'll just hit the steam room.
by John Wesley February 9, 2008
