When you are sitting on your couch, feet up on the coffee table, laptop on your lap. 4-10 hours later you are in an entirely prone position with your legs off the edge of the coffee table and your head on the seat cushion. You become completely unresponsive to your surroundings.
Loss of peripheral vision, amnesia, severely reduced motor function ability, and drooling with one eye closed are common symptoms.
I got online this morning to check my email and mess around on facebook for a bit. Next thing I know it's 7pm, my legs are totally numb, and I have this nasty trail of dried drool down my chin. That internet coma completely ruined my day!
The act of pooping on the roof of an unsuspecting person's car late at night, preferably close to the edge of the drivers side door then sticking yellow Marshmallow baby chicks into it, resulting in subjecting the car's owner to the sight before they enter it the next morning.
Man, that smelly-ass freeloader has been getting on my last nerve, maybe a midnight Mexican bird's nest would make him get the point.
Buy a
Midnight Mexican bird's nest
mug!
The recommended amount of penis a woman should have daily to avoid the symptoms of depression, anxiety, and low self esteem.
I noticed that Jane had been a bit down in the dumps recently, so I gave her a dose of dick. It cheered her right up!
When a woman seems receptive to physical interaction (fucking, sucking, fondling, etc.), but when you actually get down to it, she's real uptight about having sexy fun time and if you try she'll hurt your genitals.
A hairy cactus LOOKS soft and touchable, but if you try to play with it, you're gonna get a painful reminder.
Dude, I met this girl at the bar last night and she seemed down for some wild shit, but when I got her to my house she turned out to be a major hairy cactus, kicked me in the nuts and took off with my ipod!
A Chinese person who works all the time.
Dude, the people that work at that Chinese place up the street are some serious Chinese Mexicans. It seems like they are working there all the time!
Buy a
Chinese Mexican
mug!
A Japanese woman (or man) who really, really, really enjoys anal sex.
Dude, I was banging this tiny little Japanese girl, and I didn't even know she was a Japanese astronaut. She was basically begging for me to fuck her in her ass. What? Of course I did it.
Buy a
japanese astronaut
mug!
When you decide to enter a period of celibacy, and take up knitting to fill the void in your life.
I know this girl who recently decided to lay of the sex for a while, but she uses masturbatory knitting to relieve stress and pass the time in bed.
Buy a
masturbatory knitting
mug!
