Jerktart's definitions

coner

Noun: A coffee boner; A boner caused by the stimulation of blood flow from the caffeine in coffee.

I drank a couple cups of coffee this morning and had a raging coner for my calculus lecture.

by Jerktart May 25, 2012

Elite Marksman

A casual toilet game: when you and a friend each stand at a urinal and see who can get in the urinal from the furthest distance away.

Jacob is the undisputed champion of Elite Marksman. His urinary skills are uncanny

by Jerktart October 24, 2011

coop

A coffee poop.

While originally thought to by synonymous with moop, it is clear that not all moops are the result of coffee and not all coffee is consumed in the morning.

4 cups of coffee puts me in the bathroom all morning with a terrible case of the coop.

by Jerktart October 18, 2011

Civ

The name for a person who plays Civilization games. Generally acts like a pompous asshat and know-it-all. Tries to weasel into social groups by talking about civilization.

Bob: "You know what game I love? Civilization. You can build technology and launch the first lunar lander and -"

Ted: "Is there zerglings?"

Bob: "No, but -"

Ted: "Shut up, civ."

by Jerktart October 18, 2011

doop

Abbreviation for "death by noop."

Commonly occurs when someone locks themselves in the bathroom and dies from exposure to their own hazardous noop.

Mr. Edward Jacobs, 76, died yesterday in his apartment. Police have confirmed that he died of natural causes, a common doop incident.

No suspects are wanted for questioning.

by Jerktart October 18, 2011

mexican standoff

When you take six paces from a girl, spin 180 degrees, and masterbate furiously at her face.

I gave Kim a furious mexican standoff last night.

by Jerktart July 31, 2011

noop

An afternoon poop; Commonly taken at the end of a lunch break as a result of food and continuous coffee consumption; Sometimes referred to as an '"afternoop."

Not to be confused with a moop.

You should have seen the massive noop I took today after lunch!

by Jerktart July 29, 2011