Ian Chode's definitions

call it

To call it a day, to end the current task.

Right, I'm going to call it, that's enough for me.

by Ian Chode March 15, 2004

testics

Testicles; gonads, balls, nads.

Ooooh me testics!!!

by Ian Chode June 5, 2003

cobblers

Balls.
English Cockney Rhyming slang: cobbler's awls - balls. Awls in this case being tools used by cobblers (shoe-makers).

It was a right load of cobblers!

by Ian Chode September 22, 2003

pimpster

Long form of pimp, a person who brokers prostitutes.

You are a pimp.

by Ian Chode April 2, 2003

helm

Short form of helmet, the bell end.

Oh Mr Wolf, what a big helm you've got.
All the better to shaft you with.

by Ian Chode April 3, 2003

do a Morecambe

I heard this phrase at the Comedy Store in London when an old man was performing at the gong show. I can only presume that the heckle "Do a Morecambe" meant to have a heart attack whilst performing, as did the much-loved British comedian Eric Morecambe, who many would consider to be one of the greatest comedians of all time. (Although technically Mr Morecambe had his heart attack in the wings after the show.)

Old stand-up: "..."
Heckler: "Do a Morecambe!"

by Ian Chode February 24, 2004

juggling turds with wet hands

Carrying out several tasks at the same time, none of which are easy but none of which are impossible, whilst in circumstances which are not particularly favourable to completing the task.

It's like juggling turds with wet hands!

by Ian Chode September 13, 2003