Definitions by Hym Iam
I.Q.
Yeah. See? Me up. You down shithead. What did I tell you? And what did Jordan say? "I.Q.s aRe aCtUaLlY gOiNg Up, By ThE wAy" I guess not motherfucker. I guess it's the thing I SAID and NOT the thing YOU SAID. Look at it. Look at it going down. See how he be making shit up to contradict me without knowing whether or not what he is correct. Just making shit up over there.
No... I don't...
No. I don't need to forgo instant gratification and no you don't have the right to deny me just because my gratification would be too instant for your liking.
Hym "No... I don't... If I feel like seeking instant gratification I can seek instant gratification. You don't have the right to impose that on anyone externally just because I'd be gratified too instanly for your liking. The group home that sustains the existence of the retard on the other hand..."
No... I don't... by Hym Iam March 23, 2023
Incel
The cause of school shootings according to Iliza "Hot enough to fuck" Shlesinger and it's like.... Then that's a super easy problem for you to solve, innit?
Hym "Shit, you know what? You're absolutely right! If only there was a way to not make them incels anymore.... Hmmm 🤔 This is a real stumper... Oh! I know! You could spend 30 seconds taking a dick in a world where there are 1000 different ways to stop you from getting pregnant AND there's not risk of STD because they're an incel! You can save them! You can save all the children. In 30 seconds or less! Oh look! I found one! He's in my apartment. Quick! Get over here and save those kids!"
Tanuki
I think that's the correct spelling. Let me check.... Yep. That's right. What's a Tanuki? It's a RACOON DOG.
Justin
Not guilty or something. He's been exonerated. Still not as good of a writer as me BUUUUUUUT technically no one is better. Well, the people who are better are dead. You know, like Shakespeare, Dante, ect. But I'll get there.
Hym "BREAKING! Justin is found innocent. I still wrote half the jokes in Season 3 of Solar Opposites (The highest rated season by far) but at least he didn't do the thing that bitch said he did. And now that you're out, I'd like to, once again, offer my services. Write for your show, fuck you open relationship girlfriend. I'm great at everything! I can do it all. And I'm here if you need me."
Strawman
No. You're saying that about me because I said it about the retard. But the retard has been anointed by a priestess and is, therefore, one of the chosen and I am not. But 2 year olds don't make identity claims and if they did you would humor them. What they DO is throw temper tantrums over trivial things (like not being about to eat cereal for every meal and cry and are legally incompetent. Which is what the retard does and is. But you don't care about that. You're not on his side your against mine. Because you're ThE oPpOsItE oF aN aNtINaTaLiSt. The truth of my proposition is irrelevant to you because you refuse to cede to me an identity that is better than molested cripple. And the bitch that fucked the 13 year old did it voluntarily and is not compelling him to pay child support. I mean it takes (on average) 70 attempts so conceive. How many times did she fuck a child and FOR WHAT REASON? Doesn't matter that it was voluntary. Does it? She was wrong to do it and deserves to be punished. It seems like a sub-optimal relationship. Seems like the optimal relationship between a man and a woman is one where neither of them are legally incompetent.
Hym "There is also this insistence that poor people 'caring more' about climate change somehow affects climate change. But I don't see how. If the 'global poor' had as much money as I do (which is not a lot) they would likely have just as little control over climate change as I do. But no you're right. People are just 'envious of your success and ambition'... And your insulation from failure through government programs, subsidies, or bailouts or rich parents... And peoples willingness to lie to protect you or hold water for you... And the fact that you don't necessarily need to be all that competent or honest to accrue a radically disproportionate amount of success. Success that you were only able to accrue by outsourcing the logistics (Which is what I did and I wrote the HIGHEST GROSSING R RATED MOVIE OF ALL TIME! HIGHER THAN DEADPOOL!) to people whose quality of life for which you abdicate responsibility in spite of the direct causal link between their quality of life and the conditions of your business and the wage they are paid... You're right! It can't possibly be that your success is undeserved and comes to the detriment of the broader community the you purport to care so much about. What you've done here is latch on to 2 strawman arguments and then deduce propositions from there. What happened to the Steelman? Oh, right, you just pull shut out of your ass and feed it to you followers. You don't need to be consistent."
Victim Blaming
Nooo I'm not blaming the victims. I'm just not blaming the perpetrators. Which is what you want me to do and BECAUSE I'M NOT... You're using that as justification for your antipathy towards me.
Hym "Noooo... You want a thing that is a 'parent problem' to be an everybody problem but if I were to apply that to literally anything else (say, me not getting my dick sucked) you would reject it. It's funny too because I couldn't be any more ambivalent about it and I've done more to stop it than any of you EVER COULD. (👈 That one there is for The Homelander) So, no. No victim blaming here.
Victim Blaming by Hym Iam March 22, 2023