Hym Iam's definitions
Man I have so many nicknames now. The Goblinslayer, the Good Devil, Genius Doctor, The Joker, The Binding, The King of Cursed Spirits.
Hym "You know, speaking of Elon, I feel bad that he doesn't have a nickname of his own. He had to steal Zuckerbergs 'Eye of Sauron' thing. Don't worry Elon! I'll ce up with one... Hmm... Let see... Well, in the context of you fucking all of your friends wives and humiliating them, I, as the King of Cursed Spirits, hereby dub the 'Elon the Slutmaker.' in the spirit of the Reverend Jesse Jackson. Because anyone can be a Slutmaker, but you are THE Slutmaker. That will be 1 billion dollars."
by Hym Iam July 29, 2022
Get the Nicknamemug. by Hym Iam October 25, 2022
Get the Poetrymug. I'm walking home from work just now, and I walk out the door... Step down the hill onto the side walk... And I zone out COMPLETELY. I don't remember walking across the intersection... I don't remember crossing the train tracks... I don't remember turning the corner... I look up and I can already see my apartment.
Hym "How in the fuck did I get home just now? I can usually recall walking past some of the milestones I use to, like, keep track of my progress but this time... What the fuck happened just there? I just skipped like 80% of my walk. I... Are you trying to kill me? I lost like a full 30 minutes just there. I mean, it was 730 when I started writing this... I pooped and showered... Rubbed one out... The walk home only takes 10 minutes... I'm missing like 30 minutes. What the fuck is happening there? Randy didn't show up today... So THAT was weird... What the fuck is happening there? I mean AS SOON as I stepped on the sidewalk it's like I skipped the next 8 minutes forward in time... And then I'm still missing 22 minutes... Hmmm... Are YOU doing that? Time is all fucked today."
by Hym Iam March 9, 2025
Get the How in the fuck did I get home just now?mug. AND! AND...
Hym "EVEN IF... You needed me to think of a way to do it... An infection has been eating away at my brain for like 2 years now... So... I can barely remember whether or not I have to work tonight... Not that remembering schedules was my strong suite before not but, yeah, my cognition is down like 45%. I what saying it before. Unless I recover, you aren't getting anything profound out of this guy any time soon. I mean, I'm still better than the imposters though! Just beat one in Tekken the other day. Still the ultimate man."
by Hym Iam June 17, 2025
Get the Even ifmug. Hym "Then how about you don't deliberately do things to make people bitter and resentful? I mean, you can't possibly delude yourself into believing you're not doing this to me because you're not bitter and resentful. Well... Ok yeah no you probably can but listen: How about not stealing all of their shit. How about not denigrating them as barbarians. Or maybe not treating their culture as inferior."
Dr. Jeepjorp "Or they could just not be bitter and resentful in spite of me doing that."
Hym "Yeah, no good plan! Here, hold this:"
😫🗡😡
Dr. Jeepjorp "Noooo! Me organs!"
Hym "Oh no... You're bleeding and dying... Have you tried not bleeding and not dying? You know you've made an error if you're bleeding and dying... That error being: I have stabbed you. God hates bleeding and- Well, no, actually it loves that... Almost as much as I do!"
Dr. Jeepjorp "Or they could just not be bitter and resentful in spite of me doing that."
Hym "Yeah, no good plan! Here, hold this:"
😫🗡😡
Dr. Jeepjorp "Noooo! Me organs!"
Hym "Oh no... You're bleeding and dying... Have you tried not bleeding and not dying? You know you've made an error if you're bleeding and dying... That error being: I have stabbed you. God hates bleeding and- Well, no, actually it loves that... Almost as much as I do!"
by Hym Iam August 17, 2024
Get the Bitter and resentfulmug. Iam "See we're fine. It wasn't us. It pre-dates us by quite a bit."
Hym "The theory they posit pre-existed us but the ramping of it wasn't until after we started."
Iam "We're the catalyst?"
Hym "Exactly."
Iam "Good. That's great! Shitting on a shit sandwich is much better than trying to feed someone a shit sandwich."
Hym "Hahaha!"
Iam "See? We're good."
Hym "Ha! Ok. Alright. Creating the tool of our own subjugation would have been a blow. Ok. Ha! I thought we were going to have a 'hoisted by our own petard' situation there. Ok."
Iam "Right!? Heh! See? We're good. Hooo shit. You were freaking me out for a second there."
Hym "Yeah, I don't know what happened there. Thinking about the deeper implications of that had some pretty substantial consequences."
Hym "The theory they posit pre-existed us but the ramping of it wasn't until after we started."
Iam "We're the catalyst?"
Hym "Exactly."
Iam "Good. That's great! Shitting on a shit sandwich is much better than trying to feed someone a shit sandwich."
Hym "Hahaha!"
Iam "See? We're good."
Hym "Ha! Ok. Alright. Creating the tool of our own subjugation would have been a blow. Ok. Ha! I thought we were going to have a 'hoisted by our own petard' situation there. Ok."
Iam "Right!? Heh! See? We're good. Hooo shit. You were freaking me out for a second there."
Hym "Yeah, I don't know what happened there. Thinking about the deeper implications of that had some pretty substantial consequences."
by Hym Iam April 28, 2022
Get the Catalystmug. Hym "THAT'S THE RYAN GEORGE PODCASTER THING! How they all say '100%' all they time! HA! Oh my God! You people suck so bad! He's brilliant but you guys... Wow! You ARE the worst people! There's nothing there! You're empty! It's just 3 word chants and '100%! Totally!' Man!"
by Hym Iam March 2, 2025
Get the 100%mug.