52 definitions by Hifalutin!
“Dude, don’t go to the Van Gogh Sensurround for your birthday,” said know-it-all Mei-Mei, “it’s only awesome-ish. Hit Little Island instead, that’s way trippier.”
Knut the aspiring model checks his look in the mirror – even with new cheekbones, just awesome-ish, he thinks sadly. Next, the lip plump.
Knut the aspiring model checks his look in the mirror – even with new cheekbones, just awesome-ish, he thinks sadly. Next, the lip plump.
by Hifalutin! February 4, 2022
“I was glad I’d done due diligence on the Peloton,” aging Alice grinned as she snugged up her Eileen Fisher trousers. “I wanted the fanny mail I texted The Boss to be taut, and you should have seen that shit.”
“Tracy’s gone over the deep end, gifting fanny mail to all her faves, Drake, Nikky Jam, you name it,” Ike said ruefully. “At least I know the thongs are legit; I ordered smoked lace for her, 3 for 40 bucks from Savage X Fenty, the Valentine’s special.”
“Tracy’s gone over the deep end, gifting fanny mail to all her faves, Drake, Nikky Jam, you name it,” Ike said ruefully. “At least I know the thongs are legit; I ordered smoked lace for her, 3 for 40 bucks from Savage X Fenty, the Valentine’s special.”
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
“They’re still working with Leo on his toileting – it’s about time, he’s entering kindeegarden soon!” said Grandmaw, “ – so we were happy when the tike left us a nice casserole in the powder room w.c.”
“I thought I smelled something,” said Kath.
“No, that’s the venison stew,” said Grandmaw. “Soup’s on soon.”
Her homeys consigned Beatrice to the garret of Delta Sigma Theta, which had a private bath. When she protested, she was told that her casseroles were too fragrant for the shared space below.
“I thought I smelled something,” said Kath.
“No, that’s the venison stew,” said Grandmaw. “Soup’s on soon.”
Her homeys consigned Beatrice to the garret of Delta Sigma Theta, which had a private bath. When she protested, she was told that her casseroles were too fragrant for the shared space below.
by Hifalutin! March 6, 2022
“I can still see,” Abra.K.Dabra complained, their eyes atwinkle. “Pass me over the Vegan Volume—stepping out to Club Bahia tonight. I need mascarification – I’d rather be a blind girl, as Etta James had it."
"That was a century ago, said Fifi. "Nude eyes are the thing now."
“I saw Beatrice at Turandot but I didn’t recognize her,” said Extra Ernie. “It looked like two tarantulas had landed on a marshmallow. Then I knew her from her knobby knees and flat chest and remembered how deep she was into mascarification.”
"That was a century ago, said Fifi. "Nude eyes are the thing now."
“I saw Beatrice at Turandot but I didn’t recognize her,” said Extra Ernie. “It looked like two tarantulas had landed on a marshmallow. Then I knew her from her knobby knees and flat chest and remembered how deep she was into mascarification.”
by Hifalutin! March 8, 2022
“Why’d you have to invite James, Jr.,” demanded CocoPuff. “The last thing we need is another coldbody on this cruise.”
“Once upon a time, Sag Harbor softball picnics rocked,” grumbled Big Bess. “Then we merged leagues with the fruits, and in come the Amagansett coldbodies.”
“Water after wine,” agreed The Squid.
“Once upon a time, Sag Harbor softball picnics rocked,” grumbled Big Bess. “Then we merged leagues with the fruits, and in come the Amagansett coldbodies.”
“Water after wine,” agreed The Squid.
by Hifalutin! February 3, 2022
“Awww,” says Panda. “Surely I qualify for pandemic props. I sang Yankee Doodle while scrubbing my hands, I sanitized all the Amazon packages, I traded my handmade cloth mask for a KN95, I swore off the multiplex, I barricaded my door…”
“Yes, Good One,” says Mouse. “You were virtuous. But you only baked bread that one time, and you didn’t master the technique Francaise.”
“Mama always bakes the paratha!” protests Panda. “You know that.”
"Maybe when the next SARS rolls around," says Mouse, "you'll have your opportunity to shine."
“Yes, Good One,” says Mouse. “You were virtuous. But you only baked bread that one time, and you didn’t master the technique Francaise.”
“Mama always bakes the paratha!” protests Panda. “You know that.”
"Maybe when the next SARS rolls around," says Mouse, "you'll have your opportunity to shine."
by Hifalutin! March 6, 2022
“Show your belly,” Josefa advises Cheyenne. “Your boss sucks prunes, and that won’t change. Make her think you’re weak and she won’t know what hit her later.”
“But I’m scared,” says Cheyenne. “Who knows what will happen.”
“You will fool her,” reassures Josefa. “You are boss. In showing your belly you will fend off her attack. Go forth and prosper, as some guy said.”
“But I’m scared,” says Cheyenne. “Who knows what will happen.”
“You will fool her,” reassures Josefa. “You are boss. In showing your belly you will fend off her attack. Go forth and prosper, as some guy said.”
by Hifalutin! February 14, 2022