Harry Maguire GOAT's definitions

VARcelona

A trash club from Spain which plays in Spanish Farmers League. Known to have robbed many clubs in UCL, it managed to keep the authorities silent with money. Now it can't even qualify for Europa league round of 16. Identifying features - Use of VAR, statpadding, paying referees.

VARcelona is full of tap in merchants.

by Harry Maguire GOAT May 29, 2023

VARchester City

An oil club based in Manchester, England which plays in English Premier League, and transformed it into English Farmers League. Could manage to win only 2 league titles before takeover by an Arabian who spent a lot of oil money. Can't even win UCL unless it can spend enough on referee to be favoured by VAR.

VARchester City was the worst club in Premier league till the 2000s.

by Harry Maguire GOAT May 29, 2023

Christopher Pessibus

Another popular modern explorer from Argentina, who like Cristiano Columbus, has explored a lot of small countries like Hong Kong, Guatemala, Haiti, Bolivia and popularised football there with his penalties (though he missed some).

Christopher Pessibus is a potential explorer who can compete with Cristiano Columbus.

by Harry Maguire GOAT May 29, 2023

Cristiano Columbus

A popular modern Portuguese explorer who has discovered a lot of small countries like Andorra, Latvia, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Armenia, Azerbaijan, etc and brought them into limelight.

Cristiano Columbus is the greatest explorer ever.

by Harry Maguire GOAT May 29, 2023

Lithuaniaman

A popular footballer based in Vilnius, Lithuania. He often travels to small countries like Andorra, Latvia, Luxembourg, Armenia, etc to teach the people how to score penalties and tap ins. Some say he is the reason why football is gaining popularity in small countries.

Lithuaniaman is the best penalty taker.

by Harry Maguire GOAT May 29, 2023

Tapindowski

A Polish merchant, who trades with his teammates in Mickey Mouse league for tapins which he uses to score goals and win fake awards. Like other pen merchants like penaldo and mpaypal, he is often referred as goat.

Don't be a tapindowski. You will not get any tapins here.

by Harry Maguire GOAT April 15, 2023

Fraudi Oilrabia

A country which is popular in US because of its oil and in the rest of the world because of a ghost. It has the smallest football league in the world, sponsored by Penaldo, but claimed by Penaldogs to be the greatest league. Actually nothing less than Farmers league.

Penaldog in 2018: "Serie A is the best league in world"
Penaldog in 2023: "Fraudi Oilrabia league is the best league in world"

by Harry Maguire GOAT April 15, 2023