HMB's definitions
The practice of letting somebody in your social group get away with something normally punishable, solely by virtue of their gender.
Men in a bar will often give a woman a sexemption from paying for drinks.
Women at a homecooked dinner will often give a male diner a free pass from having to do the dishes.
Men in a bar will often give a woman a sexemption from paying for drinks.
Women at a homecooked dinner will often give a male diner a free pass from having to do the dishes.
There's a female poster on this games forum who keeps doing things that nobody would put up with in a guy poster. But I guess most of the other posters are dudes, and they don't want to scare her off, so she gets sexemption for now.
by HMB April 30, 2009
Get the sexemption mug.Shorthand for "Hitler's moustache". This describes a woman's pubic hair when she has shaved almost all of it off, leaving only a thin strip of hair covering her vulva.
So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:
a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:
a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
I asked my first girlfriend if she would shave her beaver, and it turns out she was a member of PETA so I ended up getting slapped.
Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.
Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".
If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.
Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".
If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
by HMB December 28, 2008
Get the Hitler tash mug.Chinese slang.
The act of taking advantage of somebody else, especially in financial matters, although not always. Somebody who routinely eats lunch with you but always lets you pay for it is standing you cheap.
Likewise, somebody who makes friends with you just to be around your friends is also standing you cheap.
Sometimes even doing something that's rude or disagreeable to somebody else while profiting from it is also considered standing them cheap.
The original Mandarin Chinese for this is "Zhan ... pianyi" ("stand ... cheap") with the victim pronoun appearing between the words.
The act of taking advantage of somebody else, especially in financial matters, although not always. Somebody who routinely eats lunch with you but always lets you pay for it is standing you cheap.
Likewise, somebody who makes friends with you just to be around your friends is also standing you cheap.
Sometimes even doing something that's rude or disagreeable to somebody else while profiting from it is also considered standing them cheap.
The original Mandarin Chinese for this is "Zhan ... pianyi" ("stand ... cheap") with the victim pronoun appearing between the words.
1.
HMB: I bought a subscripton to the Wall St. Journal using my credit card. Then I realized that with those extra credit card reward points, I qualified for a free subscription to the Wall St. Journal. So I canceled my subscription and got a free subscription and a refund instead.
HDT: Wow, if Wall St. Journal had a cheap on which one could stand, you definitely managed to stand them cheap.
2.
Taiwanese president Chen Shui Bian: TMD! Xiao Bush zongtong, neige wangbadan, burang wo de feiji zai Seattle jiangluo!
Chinese president Hu Jintao: LOL - haiyou ROFLMAO. Ta buyuanyi weixie womende shuangbian maoyi shounaohuiyi! Kan qilai haoxiang wo zhan ni pianyi!
(CSB: Goddammit, that bastard President Bush Jr. refused me permission to land at Seattle!
HJT: LOL, also ROFLMAO. He is unwilling to risk our bilateral trade summit meeting. It seems very likely that I have stood you cheap!)
HMB: I bought a subscripton to the Wall St. Journal using my credit card. Then I realized that with those extra credit card reward points, I qualified for a free subscription to the Wall St. Journal. So I canceled my subscription and got a free subscription and a refund instead.
HDT: Wow, if Wall St. Journal had a cheap on which one could stand, you definitely managed to stand them cheap.
2.
Taiwanese president Chen Shui Bian: TMD! Xiao Bush zongtong, neige wangbadan, burang wo de feiji zai Seattle jiangluo!
Chinese president Hu Jintao: LOL - haiyou ROFLMAO. Ta buyuanyi weixie womende shuangbian maoyi shounaohuiyi! Kan qilai haoxiang wo zhan ni pianyi!
(CSB: Goddammit, that bastard President Bush Jr. refused me permission to land at Seattle!
HJT: LOL, also ROFLMAO. He is unwilling to risk our bilateral trade summit meeting. It seems very likely that I have stood you cheap!)
by HMB August 30, 2008
Get the stand them cheap mug.The state of being a smart ass, or possibly something done to create such a state. A Latinate spelling of "smart-ass-ity".
HMB's urbandictionary definitions are characterized by their loquacity, obscurity, and smartacity.
"What your comment lacks in logical merit or accuracy, it more than makes up for in smartacity."
"What your comment lacks in logical merit or accuracy, it more than makes up for in smartacity."
by HMB December 24, 2007
Get the smartacity mug.This describes the phenomenon that people sitting in a plane will get smellier and more repulwsive than people doing a similar amount of sitting at home or at work. Regardless of how short or long your flight is, merely being seated in an airplane means your ass will stink, for several reasons.
Firstly the air pressure differential after take off means that air pockets of intestinal gas will be higher pressure and more likely to force themselves out of your chocolate barking spider.
Secondly, consider the smell of every other traveller that has sat in the same seat, warming the same cushion with the same intestinal gases and sweat, and dealing with the everpresent background noise and stress of air travel, while a crappy movie plays on a screen too small to see and which is blocked anyway by other passengers getting up, sitting down, or just hanging like douchebag fuckwits in the aisle talking to their colleagues because they think that air travel is FUN.
Meanwhile the stewardesses are busy standing in the rear gantry leaning against the snack boxes (which now cost $5 extra each just to buy) with their legs open and their panties around one ankle getting shagged from behind by the stewards, and the pilots are busy smoking weed as the airport handlers break the locks on your luggage down below to steal your souvenirs and computers, under broad security rights bestowed by the TSA federal agency while the lone fat greasy headed steward who can't get any female flight attendant to part her Pink Sea for him is taking out his frustrations by forcing people to move out of Economy-Plus seating (which costs you $75 more at the check-in counter than regular Economy for an extra 5 cm. of legroom) regardless of the fact that once the plane takes off the people will just fucking move back in because airport security can't board a moving plane, fuckwits.
This combination of low air pressure, substandard treatment, and superstandard psychological pressure results in larger than usual pockets of intestinal gas forcing themselves out of your anus and warming the fabric around your fundament.
This also means that ANY TIME A PASSENGER GETS OUT OF THEIR SEAT, their ass comes up to the same level as the seated passengers' faces. This is especially notable when the first over-caffeinated passenger jumps out of his seat at the end of a flight to grab his carry on luggage so he can be the first to wait in a completely stationary line to disembark, and you're still seated, and his ass wafts a foul stench your way that makes your eyes water.
Possibly a contributing factor to air rage.
Firstly the air pressure differential after take off means that air pockets of intestinal gas will be higher pressure and more likely to force themselves out of your chocolate barking spider.
Secondly, consider the smell of every other traveller that has sat in the same seat, warming the same cushion with the same intestinal gases and sweat, and dealing with the everpresent background noise and stress of air travel, while a crappy movie plays on a screen too small to see and which is blocked anyway by other passengers getting up, sitting down, or just hanging like douchebag fuckwits in the aisle talking to their colleagues because they think that air travel is FUN.
Meanwhile the stewardesses are busy standing in the rear gantry leaning against the snack boxes (which now cost $5 extra each just to buy) with their legs open and their panties around one ankle getting shagged from behind by the stewards, and the pilots are busy smoking weed as the airport handlers break the locks on your luggage down below to steal your souvenirs and computers, under broad security rights bestowed by the TSA federal agency while the lone fat greasy headed steward who can't get any female flight attendant to part her Pink Sea for him is taking out his frustrations by forcing people to move out of Economy-Plus seating (which costs you $75 more at the check-in counter than regular Economy for an extra 5 cm. of legroom) regardless of the fact that once the plane takes off the people will just fucking move back in because airport security can't board a moving plane, fuckwits.
This combination of low air pressure, substandard treatment, and superstandard psychological pressure results in larger than usual pockets of intestinal gas forcing themselves out of your anus and warming the fabric around your fundament.
This also means that ANY TIME A PASSENGER GETS OUT OF THEIR SEAT, their ass comes up to the same level as the seated passengers' faces. This is especially notable when the first over-caffeinated passenger jumps out of his seat at the end of a flight to grab his carry on luggage so he can be the first to wait in a completely stationary line to disembark, and you're still seated, and his ass wafts a foul stench your way that makes your eyes water.
Possibly a contributing factor to air rage.
16-B: What do you think of that chick in 14-D?
16-C: Hmm. Looks kinda tired.
16-B: She's got a sweet ass. And I think I saw her get into the toilets with a pink dildo. I think I'm gonna jerk off on her face.
16-C: Yeah, but she walked past me just now and I got a faceful of grade-A fetid rancid eyewatering airplane ass.
16-B: Eurgh. Okay. Never mind. (goes back to doing crossword puzzle)
16-C: Hmm. Looks kinda tired.
16-B: She's got a sweet ass. And I think I saw her get into the toilets with a pink dildo. I think I'm gonna jerk off on her face.
16-C: Yeah, but she walked past me just now and I got a faceful of grade-A fetid rancid eyewatering airplane ass.
16-B: Eurgh. Okay. Never mind. (goes back to doing crossword puzzle)
by HMB January 13, 2007
Get the airplane ass mug.Masturbating a woman or girl to orgasm. This takes its name from the "flicking" motion of the middle finger when you are using a wheelmouse and trying to scroll down through a lot of text. In masturbation the action is almost exactly the same, except that the mouse wheel is replaced by your lucky lady's clit.
Also, I've noticed that the sound produced is completely different.
A similar computer/sex term is "double clicking on the mouse" which also means female masturbation.
Also, I've noticed that the sound produced is completely different.
A similar computer/sex term is "double clicking on the mouse" which also means female masturbation.
HMB (who is male): So, AC, what did you do all day today?
AC (who is female): You would not believe. I found a kick-ass .zip of photochopped fake Johnny Depp porn. It was a really big file, too. I had to spend almost two hours rolling the mouse wheel just to get through it.
HMB: Dear me. Airing the orchid?
AC: You bet. I got my daily musical practice of playing the upside down piano.
HMB: Feeding oats to the pony?
AC: Tickling the toothless gibbon.
HMB: Typing in the gussets.
AC: Paddling the pink canoe until it leaks.
HMB: Finger painting the ham sandwich.
AC: Stirring the mixing bowl.
HMB: Petting the cat.
AC: Fingering the bald suspect.
HMB: ... So, um, can I borrow that .zip file? ... For, erm, personal reasons...
AC: !
AC (who is female): You would not believe. I found a kick-ass .zip of photochopped fake Johnny Depp porn. It was a really big file, too. I had to spend almost two hours rolling the mouse wheel just to get through it.
HMB: Dear me. Airing the orchid?
AC: You bet. I got my daily musical practice of playing the upside down piano.
HMB: Feeding oats to the pony?
AC: Tickling the toothless gibbon.
HMB: Typing in the gussets.
AC: Paddling the pink canoe until it leaks.
HMB: Finger painting the ham sandwich.
AC: Stirring the mixing bowl.
HMB: Petting the cat.
AC: Fingering the bald suspect.
HMB: ... So, um, can I borrow that .zip file? ... For, erm, personal reasons...
AC: !
by HMB December 9, 2006
Get the rolling the mouse wheel mug.A German word meaning "both yes and no". Derives from the German "ja" for yes, and "nein" for no. Rhymes with "shine". This usually is said in response to a question that appears to be a yes/no question but on later consideration is actually more complicated than that.
HMB: I hear in Germany they sell alcoholic beverages by the liter instead of by the pint. I'll bet that's a much better way to enjoy yourself.
Dagmar (perplexed and pondering): Jein. Actually it is not being that simple, for the price of a glass of beer is higher than elsewhere, also it is harder to pace yourself... but I understand that time is rare so I must shrug it off.
HMB: LOL and ROLFMAO at your awesome German transliterations! "Time is rare"! You German girls are so cool! (Nuffles Dagmar.)
Dagmar (bewildered): ...does not compute...
Dagmar (perplexed and pondering): Jein. Actually it is not being that simple, for the price of a glass of beer is higher than elsewhere, also it is harder to pace yourself... but I understand that time is rare so I must shrug it off.
HMB: LOL and ROLFMAO at your awesome German transliterations! "Time is rare"! You German girls are so cool! (Nuffles Dagmar.)
Dagmar (bewildered): ...does not compute...
by HMB November 25, 2006
Get the jein mug.