H.S. Willsy's definitions

Dick Sick

A really horrible word for semen. Especially if it's told to you by your girlfriend

"You gonna make your dick sick?"

"...what did you just say?"

"Ha ha, dick sick. It means spunk."

"Yeah...I got that..."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

The Pregnancy Craving Shield

When pregnant women eat junk food with no positive nutritional qualities and claim that it's a craving, they're using the pregnancy craving shield.

"Could you go out and get me another two bags of chips? And a deep fried pizza slice?"

"Really?"

"I'M CRAVING IT!"

"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

Miami Beached

When someone who is usually terrible with the ladies gets drunk and inexplicably starts pulling hot girls, they are Miami Beached.

"Is that girl still here?"

"Yeah."

"How the fuck did you pull her?"

"Don't know."

"You in shock or something?"

"Most likely."

"Shit, you were well Miami Beached."

"Indubitably."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

Depraviar

When semen is used for any purpose other than impregnating your lovely wife, it is more correctly known as depraviar

A combination of depravity and caviar (man seed)

"Leave it in honey, maybe we can make a baby?"

"Fuck that!"

"Jeez! You got it in my eye! Fuck, now it's just depraviar."

by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011

Getting Horsey

To 'get horsey' is to take ketamine

"We getting horsey tonight mate?"

"Again? I dunno man, I keep losing my shoes and I've only got this pair left."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

Giger Wanker

A Giger Wanker is someone who straps themselves to a ceiling whilst wearing a gas mask and then proceeds to masturbate to a slide show of H.R. Giger paintings. Traditionally they will mutter, "this is normal, this is normal," to themselves until they cum when they will shout, "take that sexual perversion!"

"Why is every guy I meet gay, married or a Giger Wanker?"

by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011

One Eyed Bandit

A type of live action gambling that can be undertaken in Thailand. First of all the gambler must select three Thai hookers and take them back to his room. The gambler then asks them to reveal their genitals, one by one. Like with a one armed bandit (English word for slot machine), the way to win is to get three cherries in a row. Any less than three cherries and you're BUST

"I wish they had some one armed bandit machines out here."

"We could just play one eyed bandit?"

"Hmm, yeah. Or Thai roulette maybe?"

"Either or man, I just need to unload quickly before my balls get any heavier. I feel like I'm lugging around a couple of coconuts in a 50g peanut bag."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011