Greg Toland's definitions

Mr Spock

The act of inserting two fingers into the vagina but then instead of inserting only one finger into the anus you insert two. Live long and prosper my friends!

The last thing she heard before I gave her a Mr Spock was live long and prosper my friends!

by Greg Toland November 2, 2022

turd closet

A small public toilet stall

Excuse me I gotta hit the turd closet real quick

by Greg Toland January 8, 2015

Moby Dick

Waking your wife by repeatedly beating your penis across her face in a performance reminiscent of the great John Bonham drum solo "Moby Dick"

She wouldn't wake up so I played Moby Dick. She woke up immediately

by Greg Toland January 8, 2015

Jelly Donut

When your girl is on her period you roll her in powdered sugar and aim for the red spot

I was in a rush this morning. I only had time for a jelly donut.

by Greg Toland December 5, 2022

Trap Door

When one vagina lip is bigger than the other and covers the vaginal opening when folded over.

I was rebuffed on the first three pokes until I noticed her trap door blocked my entrance.

by Greg Toland May 27, 2015

Trouser Snorkeled

To receive oral sex with your pants on (male).
Your boner rises out of your trousers much like a snorkel out of the water

Hey jimmy did you catch the concert last night?
Yes. But I missed the opening act. My girl trouser snorkeled me in the parking lot.

by Greg Toland May 23, 2015

pooniversary

The yearly marking of the date you first saw your wife's poon.

What are the ass beads and rubber fist for?
Don't tell me you forgot our pooniversary?!?

by Greg Toland April 19, 2018