Gnostic1's definitions

replacement ref

n. Anyone trying to do a job or perform a task that is clearly out of their league, or beyond their capability.

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Why is this bus turning down a one-way street?

I think there's a replacement ref driving.

Word.

by gnostic1 October 8, 2012

Rimbey

n. small town in Alberta, Canada largely populated by the interbred offspring of hippies and American draft-dodgers who didn't hear about the amnesty. Furtively growing weed and selling each other badly-strung beaded necklaces are the major industries. Tourism has been in decline since 1897 when the three-headed calf died. In 1999 a death-punk band played a gig at the pool hall prompting the passage of a country music only bylaw. Gopher heads are accepted as currency by most shop owners and, for reasons lost in the mist of time, every resident must carry a live rooster.

I shot a few gophers on the weekend. Would you like to drive to Rimbey to pick up some necklaces?

No. Not really.

by gnostic1 May 1, 2011

hack

n. two or three holes "hacked" into the ice at each end of an ice curling rink to give the sweepers somewhere to rest their brooms. Also:

v. what smokers do while curling, which is one of the few Olympic sports where smoking is allowed during the game.

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Throw some end-raise take-out weight and I'll sweep from the hack!

Hurry hard!

by gnostic1 October 3, 2011

baby blanket

n. the layer of excess new humanity threatening to consume the earth's resources.

All these people twinsing and tripleting are creating a baby blanket that will cover the earth in spit-up and used diapers.

by gnostic1 April 27, 2011

hurry hard

Exuberant exhortation shouted at the skips during curling sets at the end of each over just before the corn broomers put their rings in the house.

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Hurry hard! The shot rock is going to wreck on a slug!

You weren't hurrying hard; you were hardly hurrying.

by gnostic1 October 5, 2011

havoc

n. disruptive destruction and one of the few things that can be "wreaked"; often seen at riots and Profunda Rosa punk concerts.

Cry havoc, and let loose the dogs of war, after putting on your havoc scarf or other suitable face covering so you won't bear any responsibility for your actions.

by gnostic1 August 16, 2011

wheelnut monkey

n. an assistant or apprentice to a mechanic and, by extension, any lackey or lesser being in any endeavor.

1) Look at all the stinking grime in there. I am not touching that!

No sweat. The wheelnut monkey will handle it. Don't let him wear gloves.

2) Get the wheelnut monkey to read these documents and talk to the press about them.

Okay Mr President. I'll get Mr. Biden right on it.

by gnostic1 August 27, 2011