Newmarket

A small town in Ontario, about a hour north of downtown Toronto.

Some attractions, rich history, nice Main Street to vibe in.

It is also totally not coincidentally my hometown. That is why I know this.

And if some guy decides to scour the entirety of Newmarket to find me and murder me in my sleep, fuck.

I live in Newmarket, Ontario, Canada, North America, Earth, Solar System, Milky Way, Universe.
Why am I like this

by Gdisvvc March 20, 2023

N’golo Kante

The most cheerful man alive

N’golo Kante is a professional footballer

by Gdisvvc March 19, 2023

caught lacking

When you get caught playing video games in class

Teacher: stop playing video games
Class: he got caught lacking

by Gdisvvc April 02, 2023

fluoroantimonic acid

The most powerful acid in the known universe
DO NOT DRINK!!!

Kid: can I drink this?
Scientist: NO IT’S FLUOROANTIMONIC ACID!!!

by Gdisvvc April 02, 2023

Possession of illegal firearms

When you get caught having illegal firearms
Usually to prevent yourself from getting fucked

1: what did John do to get arrested?
2: possession of illegal firearms
1: ok

by Gdisvvc April 02, 2023

Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm

When you’re in online class and your about to die of boredom
Usually type it in your google searchbar

Mom: lemme check ur search history
Me: nooooooooooooooooooooo
My search history:
Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm

by Gdisvvc March 19, 2023

Chicken Big Mac

A Big Mac, but chicken edition

A shortcut into getting a heart attack

Also supposedly hella fucking good

Wanna go to McDonald’s
Sure, I’ll get a chicken Big Mac

by Gdisvvc March 21, 2023